The CaveDweller (part 2)

Needless to say I remain cheerily optomistic on most days and the sight of my father does not produce storm clouds and lightning bolts but perhaps a singular fizzle of smoke. so anyway, we all went camping and his presence is a source of some amusement just as much as frequent consternation. i mean seriously- exhibit A. note the socks. we arrive and set up camp. mom and i immediately take off for the beach which is a scant 100yds away- dad bikes over. immediately complains of his hip and in denial of his atrophing muscles and decides to sit as we walk off to explore the tidepools. we came back an hour later and he was sitting in the same position. sort of stiffly sitting on the towel- facing the sea- you'd think like most people, he would've maybe taken off the bike helmet, maybe the socks and shoes and thought about touching the water. but no. we come back with some seaweed samples and he flinches slightly, like he does with snakes and spiders and says- it's slimy. i say, no it's not. touch it. to which he somewhat begrudgingly obliges. i note he is in the same place we left him and what a ridiculous comedy he appears to be on a beach- patently alienated but with a dash of longing. he decides he's had enough of the sun- and goes back to camp. which is a position we find him on during most days- at the picnic table playing solitare on the laptop computer. click.click.click. click... while mom and i did watch a couple of Veronica Mars eps it is no surprise that sometime during our movie under the stars our car battery bit the dust. it is also no surprise that on this same night he went to bed and left us with the korean family- for such a conservative person my father has no sense of propriety, that and most likely the sip of beer and whiskey shot were sinking him into sleep.

and my fascination with my father is probably the only thing that keeps us in some way connected. he is a story i would like to see completed- for him to live and try new things, to go outside himself- travel again, be healthy, go kayaking and kite flying and not stand so idly by as the world surges past him... we all seek an unfettered existence. or is it just me?

so we pack up early and i make him help us dismantle the campsite. we stop at a fish/chip shack he loves in ventura, we buy him a new hat and a kite and try in whatever way we can to invite him along for the ride, intice him, make him feel the adventure is worth the inconvience of having to share his existence with other people. encourage him to wonder at the stars and open up his life to a conversation that doesn't start with the letter "i"...