Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Today I, by M

feel like a goldfish cracker that's dissolving in little water ring that's been left on the table. But oddly, I have just seen glitter rain from the sky.

your guide to OCTOBER fare, by pen

Here’s what I’ll be adding to my DVRroll. Whether or not they’ll work out remains to be seen.

1. The Ex List, Oct. 3. Stars “Ava” or Whatever-Her-Face from Grey’s Anatomy.

2. Samantha Who?, Oct. 6, if there’s room.

3. Kath & Kim, Oct. 9. The crazy, AbFab-looking one with Selma Blair and Molly Shannon.

4. SNL: Weekend Update Thursday, Oct. 9. Will air 3 eps, all about the election, I think.

5. My Own Worst Enemy, Oct. 13. The one with Christian Slater. This might be a J.Lo show.

6. Crusoe, Oct. 17. Badass tree house living!

7. Stylista, Oct. 22. The reality show that’s all ANTM meets Devil Wears Prada, or something like that. I’m sure it will be terrible, and that I’ll love it even more because it’s terrible.

8. 30 Rock!, Oct. 30.


You might also be interested in:

1. FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS, Oct. 1. But only for the DirectTV-subscribing elite. What kind of crap is that, I ask you.

2. Dirty Sexy Money, Oct. 1, which now also stars Lucy Liu.

3. Pushing Daisies, Oct. 1. Do not sweat me about not watching this show yet.

4. Ghost Whisperer, Oct. 3

5. Numb3rs, Oct. 3.

6. The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Oct. 7. I just… can’t do it.

7. The Starter Wife, Oct. 10, now on USA. Ditto, about not being able to do it.

8. Eli Stone, Oct. 14.

9. The Sarah Silverman Program, Oct. 16.

10. LC guest-starring on Greek, Oct. 28.

Oh, and—

11. America’s Stupidest Home Videos, Oct. 5. If you must.

Monday, September 29, 2008

IN LEIU of...

Last night i had this weird dream that I was trying to get to the LA Flower Market, and I was biking down there, talking to my cousin on the phone. Then while cutting thru a park I ran into my childhood friend's sister, who didn't recognize me at first, and she finally did and ran up before I left, and said, pray for me because my head is... and she was getting upset, and I nodded like I understood, about how she couldn't quite make quick connections. It took me a while to get out, bcs it was a maze of chainlinked fences, and I kept looking for a bucket, because I was completely unprepared to go to the Flower Market, and finally the girl that was with the sister and her friends, wanted to come with me thru the gate, but I pushed her back and gave her a crayon. Then I was in this beautifully gilted hallway that opened up into alcoves in rooms full of old books- think gold, wood inlay... and it was misting inside the rooms. And I thought all this mist is going to ruin the books, but I thought how odd and beautiful the mist is.... then there were these 2 girls. And I had to knock one unconscious, which I did with the end of an umbrella, a couple times because she kept waking up.... and the other girl and I ran off... onto another portion of the dream. That or my cat marley pawed my face and woke me up.

But what I was really going to blog about was, after 8 years of having plastic underwear drawers I finally freaked out and got a grownup vanity dresser- which I got in the as/is section at IKEA- the stain was this awful driftwood color with grey tones, which apparently they call "antique stain" so I stripped it, took off the hardware, restained it and the laquered it... hardware forth coming. For now, I just like the blank clean look-- and then having looked at the pic, I'm freaked out by the clutter, but there's nothing I can do about that right now. Then I went over to my friend Joanna's- and she had the same style of dresser but in desk form-- and it didn't look as hideous as my dresser.... but now, it beautifully shines. It's good to own a hand sander, stain and laquer, bcs then you can brazenly buy expensive furniture and just say- eh, i'm gonna change it.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

thought i was going nuts, by pen


I saw this guy on an ep of “Privileged,” and was all, WHERE have I seen this guy. I knew he was also on an ep of Grey’s Anatomy last spring. And that he’s a pretty good actor. And pretty hot.

And, he looks an awful lot like that DAVE guy from Road Rules, and all the challenges?

Well a brief IMDb search confirmed that it IS the Dave guy. Huh! Who knew some of these people go on to legitimate careers in the Real Real World. My people need to do a better job of keeping me informed.

Friday, September 26, 2008

side effects, by pen

I’m pretty sure it’s that fun fun FUN time of the month where I’m totally hormonal and surly and the whole world just seems like a bad place to be. In my mind, I’m the world’s worst mother, worst wife, worst friend, etc. I have NO patience. I have no patience for my LACK of patience. All thoughts are fatalistic, hyperbolic, and not grounded in reality. I’m mean. I could use a good cry. Etc.

I hate being a girl.

In addition, I’ve begun to pick up on a few other trends that seem to swirl around me during this special time, a little like Pig-Pen’s cloud of dirt-dust, except instead of dirt-dust, it’s bad luck, inattention, paranoia, and laziness.

1. I make errors with the banking. Typically it’s one little misstep in calculation that causes an overdraft, and overdraft fee, and a general feeling of ickiness, incompetence, and brokeness, none of which are really true.

2. I fail to keep up regular email communications, which I’m totally against in principle, so it makes me feel like a  big fat hypocrite. Some, like m, give me a hard time for it, feeling truly neglected. Others, like Andria, may tease me for not writing, but generally don’t mind. And Ash, well, I’ve owed her a good long email for about a month now, and she is ever-patient. What do I do while Not Emailing? I mindlessly, sluggishly surf the web for nothing in particular, and I eat chocolate.

3. I’m totally paranoid that I’m unlikable. And that people don’t want me at their parties. (Sorry, Lauren. :) ) Even when it’s completely dumb, and again, unfounded in reality. Which makes me feel overly-dramatic and more than a little self-centered.

4. I eat nothing healthy. Nothing. Not one thing.

5. All hope diminishes. Mainly this lack of hope is centered around the children, whom I imagine as grown-up and chock-full of resentful memories about their crabby mother. But other areas of life are not immune to hopelessness; I also think deep, dark thoughts about our nation’s future, Time Warner Cable, and Scrabulous. Which by the way, no longer exists.

It’s a tough time to sail through. A tiny bit easier once I realize what’s going on, and that it will be over in a few days. But in the thick of this hyper-emoting, it seems like the world will be As Is forever, and I’m so not digging it. Not one little bit.

Thursday, September 25, 2008

I would like, by M

some of that rain. In the meantime,

I feel like a cat that is eating a grasshopper. I have a wing sticking out of my mouth. Possibly comical to onlookers, but I am enjoying the crunch and the way my muscles worked to catch it...except it might give me indigestion, this branching out newness beyond my catbowl. I am a longfurred, black, grey tabby with golden eyes.

um, by pen

It’s currently raining out there WAY more than that alleged hurricane a few weeks ago. Which is fine, really. I like rain. I like chillier temps. Except, IF THE POWER GOES OUT TONIGHT,


It IS only the biggest night in television.

Something to keep in mind, Universe.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

pondering the doom and the gloom.

*Update! Emily was right, it was just renovations, and frankly, I’m so relieved. Because that Cali Avocado sandwich today was the BEST EVER. Although, decidedly smaller, for the same price. Looks like the paint and the drink machines weren’t the only renovations they made… They did give me a whole plate of pickles for K.Lo, no extra charge, so I can’t complain.

I don’t know the scoop on MG or OTB. It seems very strange to me, since they were always busy, and such a huge chain.

Kim had some disconcerting food for the thought the other day over at My Biz, about how, not to be panicky or anything, but things are looking pretty grim these days? And my thoughts are that I’m generally pretty resistant, myself, to punching the Panic Button. These things are cyclical, and it may take some years, but what goes down must come up, and all of that. It will be okay, right now, and get better eventually. But I do kind of hate it. The general air of *bleak,* the wild places my imagination goes, etc. For self-preservation purposes, I have to simply filter a lot of the news out, and focus on our own little microcosm. Have to.

ABClogoBut man. When typically hopping restaurants all of a sudden go out of business? It really does disturb me. My friend told me today that Atlanta Bread, Macaroni Grill, and On the Border are all closed. Not to mention Artisan Cafe, and WOW (the wings place). And Bar-B-Cutie across the street. Not to mention Linens-N-Things. All these restaurants/stores are in a pretty well-to-do area of town, with regular, heavy traffic (okay, maybe LNT was always dead, whenever I went, but still). I myself don’t even go out to eat a whole lot, and Atlanta Bread was a huge fav.

I’m really bummed about that one. Is it true, guys? I haven’t been over there in a few weeks. I guess it’s got to be true. Not that I’m not just as bothered when the mom-and-pop shops go out, but there’s something so foreboding about big chain stores and restaurants sinking, and all at the same time?  I’ll try not to think about it too much, because it is what it is, and as a sensitive soul, this is the sort of thing that could easily keep me up at night, when there’s nothing I can really do… Bah. I just want to know where I’m going to get my soup in a bread bowl now, not to mention my California Avocado sandwich. MAN. 



Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Reason #562 Why I’m a Phone-Phobe, by pen

9:30ish last night, the phone rings. It’s a local number, but not one I recognize or have saved to my contacts. I hate answering Unknowns, but then they call again. Maybe it is someone I know, and they really need to speak to me? Plus, J.Lo always makes fun of me for screening calls, especially the Unknowns, because he thinks it’s fun to talk to people he doesn’t know. So there’s an unspoken challenge there, and in spite of serious trepidation, it impels me to open the phone.

Me: Hello?


Me: No, I’m sorry, you have the wrong number...


Me: Uhhhh. I don’t know who you’re talking about, but it’s not--


Me: …me?

And sadly, the only thing I could think to say after that, had the conversation continued, would have been, “I don’t even know how to text!”

I’m just not good on the spot. But I like to imagine Chickie scrolling through Antonio’s text inbox later on and realizing that um, duh, she totally just bitched out the wrong person.

Just Got, by M

(actual briefcase not pictured but i'm trying to go the extra mile for penelope)

Just Got Paid $20 to put 2 words on a tiny brief case wallet thing. Didn't know I was going to get paid. Turned beet red. Was like, you can give me $5. I mean they're just tiny words on a tiny brief case and the letters aren't perfectly sized and don't match completely on the grid and how can you possibly be that pleased and like it that much with that big smile on your face? And he's like, here buy lunch on me. And I felt I'd just won the lottery. And went skipping down the hallway with a half grin, all dizzy and heady from my surprised fortune.

Today is a good day.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Today I, by M

feel like a sunflower that has died and finches are pecking out the seeds of me.

and other thoughts:

She won't stop smacking her gum but somehow I can't bring myself to say, "shut the fuck up."
So now I'm listening to ubiquitous music. It's her obliviousness that baffles.

The garden is now under control, as nature's want is to run unchecked. I usually approve but not of weeds.

The dresser is lacquered but there are unsightly ripples on the sides. Do I sand or let it be.

French has many things to remember that I can't quite get a handle.

The book 1491 is full of marvelous facts, musings, wanderings and investigations into all things the Americas. and my trip is 2months,2weeks,4days away.

Sunday, September 21, 2008

You're gonna Be Jealous, by M

this is that scene in SOUND OF MUSIC where Captain VonTrapp starts singing Edelwiess... everyone broke out their cellphones. it was pretty magical. it did lack in the warm glow of lighter fire, which the last time I got to use was a depeche mode concert back in '98. but this at least doesn't encourage smoking. but i digress. despite all experiences to the contrary i got my inner optimist on and went to the sound of music sing along at the hollywood bowl. we got these little packets, an invitation to the ball for instance, and a confetti popper for when maria and gaylord finally kiss in the gazebo. and i sung every song and i got to heckle the nazis and hiss when that would be baroness came on the scene. i got there late so there was no pre-group bonding, so i felt like i was there by myself- but i say this as a testament to the staying power of the movie that i didn't leave early and everytime i booed or cheered it warmed my chilled by the hills of hollywood core. and when that nun was singing about climbing every mountain, i thought, by god, she's right.
Climb ev'ry mountain
Search high and low
Follow ev'ry by-way
Every path you know
Climb ev'ry mountain
Ford ev'ry stream
Follow ev'ry rainbow
'Till you find your dream
A dream that will need
All the love you can give
Everyday of your life
For as long as you live
Climb ev'ry mountain
Ford ev'ry stream
Follow ev'ry rainbow
'Till you find your dream
A dream that will need
All the love you can give
Everyday of your life
For as long as you live
Climb ev'ry mountain
Ford ev'ry stream
Follow ev'ry rainbow
'Till you find your dream

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Help With Weeding, by M

marley cat, though initially dissatisfied with attempts to rip out his perfect catnest, showed a change of heart and decided to help. soon my plans for world domination will be complete. and i will promise myself to not let the garden get that unweildy again. until i forget and have to do it all over again. damned weeds. sore hands and back and sunbaked. if only my kitty had opposable thumbs.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Elle est morte.

ah my poor little meja kitty. she had a good life. her favorite activities were hunting, laying on warm surfaces, and licking you in order to get you to groom her. she also enjoyed cans of tuna and pounce treats and had the most beautiful green eyes ever, and the sweetest pink nose. we will miss her. : ( she was 70.

Today I, by M

I feel like a dresser that is lying in the garage waiting for a coat of lacquer and possibly fancy beaded handles- but no one has worked on me all week and i dream of all the shiny beads and hope animal hair and dust doesn't ruin my finish... tomorrow should be the day that decides it but for now everything is ok.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Today I, by M

Feel like a blue paint brush that has been busy, but the paint has come close to the stem and is getting clogged and dry. I either need to get back to work or be thrown into a bucket of water and cleaned properly. Otherwise things are going to go badly. The person using me though has gone to lunch or something so it sorta sucks.

Thursday PSAs

1. Watch SURVIVOR: GABON. IT STARTS TONIGHT!!! Need I say more? It starts September 25. EW! Geez. That's two screw-ups now, on your little calendar. Fringe was listed as Sept. 19, which is why we missed the original premiere date.

2. Download Google Chrome. Andria alerted me to its Beta existence, and I must say, I’m in love. I don’t date GC exclusively, mainly due to its newness and lack of compatibility with certain applications. However, I adore its Fast Dial-esque home page, which automatically lays out the top nine web sites you visit most frequently. And after bumbling around for a little while (instructions? pah, who needs instructions), looking for the all-important Google Search box, I realized that the address box itself IS the Google Search box. Except it’s even smarter, because the automatic drop-down offers to search google for your term, search your own browsing history for the term, and lists a few top sites related to the term. And related search terms themselves. Awesomeness. 

3. Read Candy Girl. I devoured it in just over 24 hours, which for me, the Slowest Reader on Earth, is saying a lot. Granted, it’s not a super-long book, but Diablo Cody’s writing is so intensely readable, funny, entertaining (she penned Juno, in case you didn’t know), and the subject (stripping for the hell of it, pretty much) kills. If you’re nice to me, I’ll let you borrow it. 

4. Be excited for more things Sex & the City! The movie comes out next Tuesday on DVD, of course. I read in EW earlier this week that they’re seriously talking about a sequel to the movie, or at least the idea is in the works… AND (I’m most excited about this one), a teen book called “The Carrie Diaries” should be coming out one day, covering Carrie Bradshaw’s high school years. Yay! 

5. Use your antibacterial hand gel, and stock up on rum—er, medicine—for the whole family. K.Lo’s got a nasty cold and is sneezing and snotting everywhere. It doesn’t look good for the rest of us. And tissues, we’re going to need lots of tissues. And maybe some noise-canceling headphones for the extra (lord help me) whininess.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Today I, by M

I feel like a particle of dust that is being warmed and laid bear by the sunlight. It is slightly hot, and there ARE a lot of other particles around me, and so much to do as particles with the moving and the floating and the GOING and the doing.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Today I, by M

Today I am a cloud that is being pulled by the wind until I am a wisp. I would like to be a cloud filled with rain but it is hot and arid and i am disappearing into the blue and sunny bits of asphalt and concrete enclosures.

+ tonight i'm going to go see The Fly... the OPERA. oh yah. gonna tell ya' all about it.

Monday, September 15, 2008



I’m so bummed to see that one of my favorite non-fiction writers ever, David Foster Wallace, died this past weekend, at age 46. Suicide. I’m kind of at a loss for words.

He wrote novels as well, obviously, but his essays with their zillion hilarious footnotes always stuck with me since first beginning to study creative non-fic years ago. A Supposedly Fun Thing I’ll Never Do Again should be on your Must Read Someday list, if you haven’t yet. Both the book and the essay itself are utterly fantastic.


Sunday, September 14, 2008

Shadow Box #2, by M

here is the 2nd shadow box. there might be more, it's safe to say. i think i captured more of the shadow box thing i was looking for originally. the latin phrase means: "newly risen, how brightly you shine." But I later switched the phrase out to "sui generis" which means: one of a kind/of it's own kind... which fits this person much more.

Friday, September 12, 2008

for reals jack j., by pen

1. Jack J. is a handsome man.

2. Jack J. is all about water and the beach and surfiness and acoustic guitar. It’s Hawaiiany breeze, musicfied.

3. The reason Jack J. is so near and dear to my nostalgic little heart is it reminds me of first starting to date J.Lo, who is so into all sorts of music by nature, and we listened to a lot of it around then. Before Jack J. was all popular and mainstreamed. I think of spring and flowers and warmth and driving to wherever with the windows down. I feel mainly peace.

And, he amuses me.

Taylor - Jack Johnson

M's Truth about Jack, J.

Jack J. is too MELLOW to the point of somnambulance. Like so languid I might pass out. So mumbly I might fall face forward into pasta. So breezy that I might just fly away like a balloon and passout in the upper atmosphere and then find myself plummeting to earth so that when I wake up nothing is in my brain. He's just not for me. And it's not like I hate it. I just recognize something that is so not apart of me as to be completely a part of someone else. But my question, I want a good story in brief about why it is so important to Pen and I will love it a little bit more by association.

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Animal Facts Thursday, by M

In a bizarre twist my show entered into my dream but not before it got really disturbing then slightly more disturbing. It all started out simply enough, a friend of mine was moving into the middle bedroom, which is currently filled with boxes, and then it became a matter of finding space for it in the garage. My friend was already in there moving slabs of particle board and I was debating if we should put them here or there or anywhere when the shop foreman came in. It was, as a garage, a vast 2 story warehouse. And we started talking. Suspiciously he looked a lot like my cousin Sean. So then dramatic alteration of story akin to greek tragedy. My father was now the king, sitting enthroned with his new wife, who was young and polynesian or something, and we were all in greekliketragedy robes. I did look really good in white and my hair was in curls, i think. But then in a more horrible twist as I entered the 2nd floor of the warehouse, which was now a stage for a performance, a man was on stage with dark curly brown hair, tied up, arms splayed out and dying. His face was covered with a plaster casting, or mask of some kind and it was thick. I thought it was part of the performance. But with his last dying breath the mask on his face cracked and broke away as he distorted his face, and it turned out to be my boyfriend. And he says, It was your father! And he dies! And THEN, they kill me! At least I think they do. Jump cut to, I'm on the 2nd floor... I think I must be a ghost, but maybe I've just gotten loose because the kings wife spots me and is yelling for him. And i'm on the 2nd floor and I see a cat who has a snare trap around his neck and he's struggling. It's a scruffy orange tabby and a tricky business but I free him and run off. THEN I confront the now queen and push her to her death and I see her fall about 3 stories to her death, hitting a support beam on her way down and laying still in her white gown. And then, dude, I woKE UP.

a long ass list of facts from catscan and maybe tomorrow me and my love for cats.


Ailurophilia is the "love of cats."

The nose pad of a cat is ridged in a pattern that is unique, just like the fingerprint of a human.

There are more than 500 million domestic cats in the world, with 33 different breeds.

The American cat population reached nearly 68 million in 1996. American Demographics magazine estimates that's about 200 million kitty yawns per hour and a whopping 425 million catnaps each day!

A cat's heart beats twice as fast as a human heart, at 110 to 140 beats per minute.

25% of cat owners blow dry their cats hair after a bath.

The largest cat breed is the Ragdoll. Males weigh twelve to twenty pounds, with females weighing ten to fifteen pounds. The smallest cat breed is the Singapura. Males weigh about six pounds while females weigh about four pounds.

Calico cats are almost always female.

If your cat is near you, and her tail is quivering, this is the greatest expression of love your cat can give you. If her tail starts thrashing, her mood has changed --- Time to distance yourself from her.

Cats wag their tails when it is in a stage of conflict. The cat wants to do two things at once, but each impulse blocks the other. For example: If your cat is in the doorway wanting to go outside, and you open the door to find it raining, the cat's tail will wag because of internal conflict. The cat wants to go outside, but doesn't want to go into the rain. Once the cat makes a decision and either returns to the house or leaves into the rain, the tail will immediately stop wagging.

Don't pick a kitten or a cat up by the scruff of its neck; only mother cats can do this safely, and only with their kittens.

Cats knead with their paws when they're happy.

Your cat loves you and can "read" your moods. If you're sad or under stress, you may also notice a difference in your cat's behavior.

The domestic cat is the only cat species able to hold its tail vertically while walking. All wild cats hold their tails horizontally or tucked between their legs while walking.

An average cat has 1-8 kittens per litter, and 2-3 litters per year.

During her productive life, one female cat could have more than 100 kittens.

In 1952, a Texas Tabby named Dusty set the record by having more than 420 kittens before having her last litter at age 18.

The largest known litter (with all surviving) was that of a Persian in South Africa named Bluebell. Bluebell gave birth to 14 kittens in one litter!

A single pair of cats and their kittens can produce as many as 420,000 kittens in just 7 years.

More than 35,000 kittens are born in the U.S. each year. Spay or neuter your cat!!

Cats have 290 bones in their bodies, and 517 muscles.

A cat has five more vertebrae in her spinal column than her human does.

There are three body types for a cat. Cobby type is a compact body, deep chest, short legs and broad head. The eyes are large and round. Muscular type is a sturdy body and round, full-cheeked head. Foreign type is a slender body, with long legs and a long tail. The head is wedge-shaped, with tall ears and slanting eyes.

Sir Isaac Newton, discoverer of the principles of gravity, also invented the cat door.

A cat will amost never "meow" at another cat. This sound is reserved for humans.

Know how old your cat really is. If your cat is 3, your cat is 21 in human years. If your cat is 8, your cat is 40 in human years. If your cat is 14, your cat is 70 in human years.

The average age for an indoor cat is 15 years, while the average age for an outdoor cat is only 3 to 5 years.

The oldest cat on record was Puss, from England, who died in 1939 just one day after her 36th birthday. (We wish we could have them all that long!)

The weirdest cat on record was a female called Mincho who went up a tree in Argentina and didn't come down again until she died six years later. While treed, she managed to have three litters with equally ambitious dads.

A cat's normal body temperature is 101.5 degrees. This is slightly warmer than a humans.

People who own pets live longer, have less stress, and have fewer heart attacks.

Cats love to chew on grass, catnip, parsley or sage.

There are two species of wild cats in African and Europe that still hunt. These two species both resemble the domestic tabbies.

The behaviors shown by most house cats have a parallel in the wild.

A cat will kill it's prey based on movement, but may not necessarily recognize that prey as food. Realizing that prey is food is a learned behavior.

The greatest number of mice killed by one cat? 28,899! Towser, a tortoise-shell tabby in charge of rodent control in Scotland, killed 28,899 mice in her 21 years. This is about four mice per day, every day, for 21 years. Towser died in 1987.

The first cat show was held in 1895 at Madison Square Garden in New York City, New York.

A falling cat will always right itself in a precise order. First the head will rotate, then the spine will twist and the rear legs will align, then the cat will arch its back to lessen the impact of the landing.

"Sociable" cats will follow you from room to room to monitor your activities throughout the day.

What kind of "mood" is kitty in? Her eyes, whiskers and ears will tell you. Learn to read the signs she gives you.

The most popular names for female cats in the U.S. are Missy, Misty, Muffin, Patches, Fluffy, Tabitha, Tigger, Pumpkin and Samantha.

Give your cat a quality scratching post to deter her from scratching your furniture. Still scratching? Try putting lemon scent or orange scent on the area. Cats hate these smells.

In English, cat is "cat." In French, cat is "Chat." In German, your cat is "katze." The Spanish word for cat is "gato," and the Italian word is "gatto." Japanese prefer "neko" and Arabic countries call a cat a "kitte."

Cats get their sense of security from your voice. Talk to your cats! And be mindful of your tone of voice. Cats know when you're yelling at them (though they may not care).

The more cats are spoken to, the more they will speak to you.

The richest cat in the Guinness Book of World Records is a pair of cats who inherited $415,000 in the early '60s. The richest single cat is a white alley cat who inherited $250,000. (Now that will buy a lot of catnip!)

The Giraffe, Camel and Cat are the only animals that walk by moving both their left feet, then both their right feet, when walking. This method of walking ensures speed, agility and silence.

It is believed that a white cat sitting on your doorstep just before your wedding is a sign of lasting happiness. White cats are a symbol of good luck in America, while black cats are a sign of bad luck.

Cats can see color. Cats are partially color blind. They have the equivalency of human red/green color blindness. (Reds appear green and greens appear red; or shades thereof.)

Cats don't see "detail" very well. To them, their person may appear hazy when standing in front of them.

Cats need 1/6th the amount of light that humans do to see. Their night vision is amazing!

Cats can see up to 120 feet away. Their peripheral vision is about 285 degrees.

Cats eyes come in three shapes: round, slanted and almond.

The color of a kitten's eyes will change as it grows older.

At birth, kittens can't see or hear. Cats open their eyes after five days and begin to develop their eyesight and hearing at approximately 2 weeks. They begin to walk at 20 days.

Kittens begin dreaming at just over one week old.

A cat's ear pivots 180 degrees. They have 30 muscles in each ear, and use twelve or more muscles to control their ear movement.

A group of kittens is called a "kindle."

A group of grown cats is called a "clowder."

Cats rub up against other cats, and people, in an attempt to "mark" them with their scent glands. They most often use the scent glands between their eye and ear (near the temple area) or their scent glands near the base of their tail.

Have you ever tried to feed your cat food that was just taken out of the refrigerator? Most cats prefer their food at room temperature, and will boldly REFUSE any food that is too cold or too hot.

Many experts report that cats will purr when feeling any intense emotion (pleasure or pain).

Give your cat fresh water at least once a day. If your cat refuses your tap water, it may be sensing (with it's superior sense of smell) the chlorine or other minerals in your water. Many finicky felines demand bottled water, just like their human counterparts.

Don't put your cat on an all-vegetarian diet. Cats need protein to survive.

Never feed your cat dog food. Cats need five times more protein than dogs do.

If your cat misses one meal, a trip to the vet may be necessary.

Cats are the sleepiest of all mammals. They spend 16 hours of each day sleeping. With that in mind, a seven year old cat has only been awake for two years of its life!

Cats are more active during the evening hours.

Cats spend 30% of their waking hours grooming themselves.

95% of all cat owners admit they talk to their cats.

Backward-pointing spikes on a cat's tongue aid in their grooming.

The average cat weighs 12 pounds.

If you can't feel your cat's ribs, she's too heavy.

If an overweight cat's "sides" stick out further than her whiskers, she will lose her sense of perception and stability. Don't be surprised if she starts to squeeze into an opening that the rest of her can't fit into, only to back herself back out quickly!

According to the Guiness Book of World Records, the heaviest cat on record was Himmy, an Australian cat, who weighed 46 pounds, 15.25 ounces in 1986. Himmy's waist was 33 inches! The previous record-holder had been Spice, a ginger-and-white tom cat from Connecticut, who weighed 43 pounds when he died in 1977.

The tiniest cat on record was Tinker Toy from Illinois. A male Himalayan-Persian, he weighed 1 pound, 8 ounces fully grown and was 7.25" long and 2.75" tall!

Your cat is probably either a "righty" or a "lefty." Only 40% of cats are ambidextrous while another 40% are either right-pawed or left-pawed.

Cats love high places. They share this love with leopards and jaguars, who sleep in trees. If a cat begins to fall, his inner ear canal (which controls balance) will help him right himself and land on his feet.

Domestic cats are essentially loners. When placed in a group, they develop their own hierarchy. As long as there is plenty of food on hand, a cat can learn to share it's domain with other cats.

Cats are more aggressive when they are not neutered or spayed.

21% of U.S. households have at least one cat.

The number of pet-owning households is expected to grow nearly 12% between 1993 and 2000, and another 5% between 2000 and 2010.

34% of cat-owning households have incomes of $60,000 or more.

32% of those who own their own home, also own at least one cat.

"Pair bonds" can develop between two cats who live together, or between a cat and a person.

A cat that bites you after you have rubbed his stomach, is probably biting out of pleasure, not anger.

An adult cat has 32 teeth.

Never leave your cat in a vehicle alone. On summer days, temperatures in an automobile can reach 160 degrees in just minutes, even with the windows cracked.

"PSI trailings" attempt to explain a cat's ability to travel a long distance to return to their home. It is said they use the earth's gravity to determine "their place" in the world, and to develop the ability to return there when necessary.

According to myth, a cat sleeping with all four paws tucked under means cold weather is coming.

Each year Americans spend four billion dollars on cat food. That's one billion dollars more than they spend on baby food!

Expect to spend an average of $80 per year on vet bills, for the lifetime of each cat you own.

It costs $7000 to care for one household cat over its lifetime. This covers only the necessities; the pampered pet will carry a higher price.

In an average year, American cat owners spend $2.15 billion on cat food and $295 million on kitty litter.

There have been three different cats who have played the famed "Morris the Cat." The first Morris was adopted from a shelter in 1968. In 1969 he landed the role of Morris the Cat in the famous 9 Lives Cat Food commercials...and was an overnight success! The first Morris died in 1978 and was subsequently replaced by two more cats who played "Morris." All three of the "Morris the Cat" cats were rescued from shelters.

A flashlight makes a great cat toy! Turn the flashlight on in a dark room, and watch your feline "chase" the beam of light!

A collar and tag can help your cat find his way home should he ever be lost. Better yet -- outfit your cat with an electronic identification chip.

Egyptians shaved their eyebrows as a sign of mourning when they lost a beloved cat.

Hebrew folklore believes that cats came about because Noah was afraid that rats might eat all the food on the ark. He prayed to God for help. God responded by making the lion sneeze a giant sneeze -- and out came a little cat!

for more information about these amazing animals: