Thursday, November 30, 2006
the trip started quintessentially as we happened upon this french bistro for lunch in dana point. i had Le Poulet au Basilique: a spicy chicken basil sandwich with diced apple, celery and fresh spinach. twas zesty if not exactly spicy. the ambiance was perfect to the upscale american locals, the bread and jam and the authentically french owner... it was like being on holiday. after a driving diversion to a trader joes we made our way back and found our campsite. just one spot from beachfront. next time it will be ours! it will be a particular regret of childhood that i did not get to go camping all the time or stay weeks at some other place...
we spent our mornings eating tasty things like eggs and bacon.. and proudly i made a parfait and we ate it on the beach along with some tea. idyllic. yes. down to the fresh raspberries and blueberries. and the quiet and the break of the waves.
over all it was a strange holiday bcs we went out every day into town and sampled the food from san juan capistrano to san clemente. so i wouldn't call it a camping trip so much as a sort of mellow meandering vacation with a few scenic driving diversions which we'll never speak of again. we managed to get a blanket for mom after i uh, forgot her sleeping bag after a night of sharing... and a new fuse from the ford dealership after we blew our outlets and had to finish 'school of rock' as a 2 parter. besides finishing lemony snickets: 'the end' we also watched 2 excellent movies via the most excellent laptop in the car were 'all about eve' and 'the devils backbone' (a spanish thriller) oh and not to forget '39 steps'. one of my favorite early hitchcocks. and while we were not sampling the local eateries we bird watched... we think these guys are 'coots' but if someone knows for sure let me know! among these funny birds we saw loads of pelicans plummeting in the water for fish, egrets, comorants, gulls, mallards, sandpipers and little fastwalker something or others.
we also went kayaking... and the waves were calm as a lake- and the day was hot and the water looked inviting. we went tandem and i had an unsettled stomach and clogged sinuses. so i only lasted an hour. we decided to be 'cute' and try to propel ourselves onto the plastic boat launch. i scooched us back and mom torked us to the right but the kayak being just a hair on the plastic still... pivoted us into the water instead. instantly my malaise was gone and i was finding myself refreshed and very wet in the harbor. luckily we were laughing... and i chidded myself for being lazy and not docking properply but glad... and then regretted i didn't take the time to practice trying to get back in the kayak once capsized. alas. after the fauna are some flora and the place mom and i had our one english outing to compliment the french.... pasties and shepards pie... next time we'll order the champange brunch... after that we wandered around in an antique mall, and found a ladys home journal picture all about a girl eating nervous walnuts... we took walks on the beach and were generally relaxed and comatose. i found myself slightly restless at points though like i had to get back to something... as if all that driving reminded me of where i was headed next... which was my garden at home and 'the job' which i must blog about poste haste. the rest doesn't matter. it was all delicious. and much like being in another world. mom says who has to leave the country to have a proper outofplace experience. i say, this will do for now.
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
1. i compulsively turn on/off lights. during dusk i turn on lights bcs i don't want to reenter a dark room, however i will go around the house after dark and turn off lights in certain rooms and leave them on in others. also i hate porch lights bcs it's light pollution and most street lights too. when flying overhead in chicago i imagined the city 1/2 lit. i loathe florescent lighting and would rather sit in a dimly lit office than have my retinas burned. and if i can i will turn them off even when the coworkers nicely say, oh but you don't have to sit in the dark... the strange looks i get when i say 'i prefer it' never ceases to amaze me. the presence of such lights also contributes to my dislike of superstores like walmart and target and i always tie that and linoleum together. i am constantly amazed at the heat candles give off, i love fire and when i have my mag flashlight and am walking in the dark when camping i wish i knew morse code so i could tap out something significant like a sonnet or maybe an ode. i do however love the glistening of sun on the water and the sharp light of winter. once at a temp job there was a light switch in a hallway that seemed not to be going anywhere. so i flipped it off everytime i went to the restroom. my boss caught site of me doing it one day and apparently i'd been plunging a hallway down the way into darkness. served them right for bad wiring. that's what i say. also the lights in my garage are wired wrong and and they don't switch off in order and it drives me nuts. but not in that specially certifiable way.
2. i very frequently used to have, and sometimes still have, dreams about casting out demons but not in people but in their ethereal forms. in the name of jesus, very fiercely and intensely, and very real in a dark empty space. i once woke up holding my bible.
3. speaking of the intangible more times than i can count people come to me with the phrase "i've never told anyone this before but..." and it usually involves them telling me about how they are being haunted or how their houses have been haunted.
4. i have a strange way of telling people things about themselves they didn't want to tell me and unfortunately usually flippantly and in 'what if' or 'at least your not' scenarios. it's made for a few awkward wide eyed revelations.
5. my mom reminds me that though she thinks the fact that i don't like olives is weirder, weirder still is that i have a hair birthmark- one patch on the right side of my head about the width of a quarter. it's jet black and apparently is greying faster than all the other hairs on my head.
6. and sadly i have a diminished sense of smell and one day will try to improve it with a nose job. i blame my father's second hand smoke, the smog of the 80's and asthma and a cramped womb for my crooked nose. good times. consequently this explains why salt in large portions has always been appealing. and i have a serious ear sensitivity issue. i myself i'm sure make noise while doing things like chewing, and since i compulsively fidget i know those things make noise- however my mother's noises drive me irrationally nuts- her cracking jaw, her loud yawns, the clicking her wooden knitting needles make.... the turn signal clicker in the car, people gulping water and gasping as if they were dehydrated and on the point of death, the sound of teeth against metal forks, ambient wirrring sounds, buzzing, audio feedback from a bad adapter, oh and mom swirling her ice cubes in the glass- sure i used to endlessy blow bubbles in chocolate milk, drain the cup like it was gold and mercilessly tap on pans... still. if the whole world would quiet down that would be great. did i also tell you i'm an advocate of decreasing noise pollution globally? oh and refrigeration machines cycling on. i HATE that!
i tag kurt, oh silent one. and cue oft gone one. just to perhaps rally them... and really enquiring minds want to know.
my love, mqa.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
laundry, more laundry
pre-shopping, finish master plan
catching up on dvr'd shows
bake cookies, various other holiday treats
dream of snow
enjoy temps in the 70s anyway
play with baby
throw ball for doggies
pick out a Christmas tree
drink hot chocolate, despite lack of need
seek, tape, and watch enjoyably vapid&feel-good holiday movies on Lifetime, Hallmark, and ABCFamily channels
ponder place in the world
not blogging (gasp)
reading a book (the time traveler's wife)
eating stuffing, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes, green beans, pumpkin and apple pies
not watching dvr'd shows
mini-breaking w/ J.Lo at the beach
lots of driving
listening to goblet of fire on cd
declining (due to full stomach) turkey leftovers
kicking self later for decline of turkey leftovers
pre-Christmas shopping, i.e. the master-planning of, but not the actual purchase of all items
saying hello to doggies and sorry we left you!
saying hello to baby and sorry we left you!
laundry, lots of laundry
Monday, November 27, 2006
I also didn't speak when I moved to Chicago, which is sort of unfortunate because I moved back after just one academic year, though I was lucky enough to grab onto mendacious' friendship, and well, here we are. (Cheers!)
And then I moved to Wilmington, where you all know I was rather silent for at least a year, but my former boyfriend was also an un-fun, pessimistic jackass, so I blame him.
2. Every morning when I pick out clothes to wear, I feel a very strong pull toward one color or another. If I don't choose clothing of this color, I feel I will have a very bad, or at least a very uncomfortable day. I typically give in to the impulse, as it makes me feel much better when I do.
3. I'm allergic to scallops, but no other seafood. They make me heave violently, and every time I walk by them in the seafood section I hold my breath and cringe, like they're going to come after me. The allergy is genetic, as my aunt is also allergic to only scallops. Also, my husband questions the authenticity of this allergy, which infuriates me to no end, like I'm being busted for something I absolutely did not do.
4. I have a lot of vivid dreams, and many of them are apocolyptic in nature. I've had dreams about entire cities being either blown up or swallowed by water, and they are rarely in reaction to the particular news of the day. I've had a few dreams about this really insanely long bridge over blue blue water, and being on or under it somehow? while it was being engulfed and everyone raced to save themselves, in cars and on foot. Then when the Real World: Key West was on, I was like, OMG, that's the bridge. Even though I had never been to or seen pictures of Key West before. I don't feel the dreams are prophetic, just the product of an overactive imagination and an anxious personality.
Lately my apocolyptic dreams have been limited to my entire aquarium dying from an obscure fish plague (the name of which I can never remember after I wake up) while I watch helplessly. I don't know if the scaled-down version is more or less alarming.
5. I've never broken a bone or had stitches. But I get bruises all the time and have no idea where they come from.
6. When I was little, I loved each and every one of my stuffed animals, to the point where I wouldn't get rid of any of them, ever, and as a result still have many squirreled away in various attics and storage places. (Though to my credit, I've been making a concerted effort of late to break this packrat habit, and have sent many off to goodwill, telling myself that it's time for someone else to love Gav the Christmas Bear and the bunny with one button eye.) I remember going through a phase where I arranged every last stuffed animal on my bed before going to sleep at night, for fear that one might feel left out. Except for this one, a pink poodle named Cindy. I hated Cindy with every fiber of my being, and used to beat her up regularly--but then felt deep remorse afterward and tried to talk myself into liking her. It never worked.
I could go on all day--seriously, this topic was fantastic. Thanks, Kim and ashley! I tag mendacious, daniel bruckner, cue (if you're out there???), t. (triple now, at least), sarah, szu-hua, and the sick cookie.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
5. bills a.forbear? b. huge att bill c. payday? when? d. paperwork on desk
7. order photos
8. dye hair
9. plant flowers
11. clothing repair
12. iphoto and eTSy (money?)
13. get paints from blick
14. take back dress? a standard for weight loss or a waste of money.
15. eat turkey and stuffing
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
and i wanted to also discuss the pros and cons of caridee, including her performance on one tree hill, which was... i can't decide. sassy and impressive and yet?
and i also had this idea for a post about perception, and how when you're hormonal, it feels like the day just won't ever be right, despite small victories. you feel like you're karmically (karma-i-cally?) screwed. but i didn't do that, either. and i should have wished j.lo a happy anniversary via the blog yesterday, too, but at least we celebrated right otherwise. two years and already a house and a munchkin in tow, yaaaay for us! but what a whirlwind--see, these are the things i should discuss.
maybe we just need to change our colors? because i think of posting to brown-black with halloween edges, and i'm feeling the drag-down. so maybe i'll ponder that.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
I guess every time you notice something new, and I can't figure out quite why it took so long for me to notice, being such a hardcore Dawson's Creek fan as well, but Mary Callaghan is totally Abby Morgan. Mean, caustic, bitchy Abby Morgan, who gave everyone (particularly Joey) a hard time, and ended up biting it one night after getting drunk with Jen Lindley and landing herself in the water.
Anyway. It all makes sense now. But the next mystery remains: is this really Mary Callaghan? I guess we've been introduced the wonderful world of collagen injections.
Friday, November 17, 2006
i had these weird dreams last night- the dragon which was red was good, and the rainbow that broke rained down as sharp cutting glass... but the dragon melted it with its fire- and it turned to rain. so that's awesome. and there was a guy holding an umbrella for me so i was mostly pretty well protected.
otherwise i'm leaving for camping tomorrow am. and the campground has wi/fi. so hopefully we won't kill the battery like last time and i'll try to post from the road... or uh, beach as it were.
things: hopefully the plants won't die while were gone and the animals will survive without us, i'll kite fly and get a tan.
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Then again, writers are known to write more than one book on a certain subject, even (it's true) highly questionable subjects such as osprey. But I digress.
Anywho, I wanted to write tonight to defend the night coming early. Every fall at Daylight Savings Time, after luxuriating in their extra hour's sleep, people grumble. It's the general consensus out there that it sucks, the world falling dark an hour early. I can understand it, totally. But secretly, I love it, and always have.
The general argument is that when people leave their jobs after fall DST begins, it's already dark, therefore emphasizing the irritating point that one's day is officially gone--because it's dark now, and it's not like you have any daylight left to enjoy. Tonight it was getting quite dark at 5:30, and so I could really see how, if you were a bigger fan of daylight, the fall and winter months would be not so happy times. But the way I look at it is, night=relaxing time, TV time, cozy, curled up on the couch eating dinner time, and more dark-time means that it starts all the earlier. Yes, you have less day, less sunshine, but the tradeoff is more mandatory hibernation. And even when I did have a job and left after dark, there was something magical about spying the moon on the way to the car.
So here's to the early dark, the moon, the stars, flannel pj pants, and maybe some seasonal beverages, like hot chocolate or cider or snowflake-labeled beer.
as i am
in the small
but rapid wakes
seceding in their
to the shore
call it so
was a start
where it went
but call it another name.
time reckons it
it wants not
as it moves
but must with
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
Ask.com Gift Finder: This is your gift finder, the search engine where you can sort by personality type (fun!), occasion, age, interests, etc. I've used a few gift-finders before, and although I especially like the Curiosities section on amazon.com, I have to say, I'm impressed.
Although for myself, I'm still puzzling, in an amused sort of way, whether I'm really "Domestic Diva." Since they have a TV/Pop Culture Fan "interest" section, I wonder why this can't transfer over to personality types? Although do I wish to be so pegged? But Bree Hodge/Martha Stewart I am not. (I swear.) Unless Bree Hodge watches Survivor and subscribes to EW.
Uncommon Goods: One of those random, quirky sites with a little bit of weird-fun-everything, kind of like Rare Cargo or Blackbeard's Bryde downtown? Except you don't have to leave your house. Nice...
Perpetual Kid!: My personal favorite. Just see for yourself. And know that you may shop for penelope here.
Monday, November 13, 2006
well anyway i'm okay with it for the moment and i'm not quite sure why- there is a faint hammering in my heart. but i remain undaunted though the lack of funds rapidly encroaches... but then the hammering awakes something that i'd forgotten. i'd like to think i've changed and become a calmer and more patient person that the person that used to work in retail... that's for another post but the 2 have to reconcile... bcs the facts have not changed. my world is still opposed to the one i'm currently working in. and i find all the contrivences outrageous and yet. and yet. and yet. why?
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Inspector Mom! Let's hear it for Winnie Cooper, woohoooo! I certainly hope the show lives up to all the hype.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
dear B, i sorta kindof already knew that but um... it made it all worth it when i got a peek at the last page of my application. i would've asked for a copy but i had the feeling you wouldn't have given it to me. my psych profile. well okay, B, i mean i looked and then you left and I uh, kept looking you know. and then you kept staying gone so what else was i going to do but copy it all down in my emp. handbook so i could blog about it later. i mean, come on, B- it's priceless. like if i get fired for it- it'd be worth it. like no matter what goes wrong... and something will go wrong, it was worth it. sort of like when cartman kidnaps butters so he can go to casa bonita and when he jumps from the waterfall and they ask him if it was worth it, he turns over in the water and he says, "totally."
so like i said, that's what i'm going to do:
there are three catergories: three colors :three precentage scores...and a whole lot of dash marks.
1. Customer Service: 25%: Yellow
"Less Likely To..."
-maintain a good mood
-show patience instead of frustration
-spend time with customers instead of alone
-consider customer's feelings and needs
-listen carefully, understand and remember
-cooperate with co-workers
(okay, like seriously, they have me pegged... in a worst case scenario situation, except for the alone part, that would be like all the time.)
2. Dependibility: 71%: Green
"More Likely To..."
-usel logic to draw sound conclusions
-use time efficiently
-motivate and inspire employees
-give work a lot of energy
-form effective work relationships
-actively listen to others
-show personal stability and responsibility
-manage own stress well
-persuade and influence employees [to do a (good) job]
-make oneself easily understood
(so i'd be good at world domination right? awesome.)
3. Sales: 45%: Yellow
"Less Likely To..."
-keep busy and sustain energy
-be friendly, sociable and outgoing
-follow thru on commitment
-show resistence to rejection
-maintain a positive outlook
-learn quickly and show good problem solving skills
(wow, thanks. mainly because oh i don't know, selling things to people is stupid.pricks.)
heh. so yah. i'm working... 3 days in and i feel i've been there for a whole lot longer than that. but oddly not- for instance i don't have my electronic time card yet: so they can't meticulously clock my comings and goings. YET. and i dont have my company mug or a locker... but whatever. they keep talking like i'm going to be staying. like i've been permanently hired though i'm really just under the heading temporary/seasonal- and let's not forget only making $7.50 an hour... and they gave me the run of organizing the entire kids section, and the inventory manager really likes me, but guys you know... the shoe's going to drop. bcs regardless i can't live on $7.50 an hour for 7 hours, 5 days a week, after taxes. No matter if you suggested i could make supervisor or if we watch ANTM, VM and UglyBetty on our lunch breaks. I mean, you saw my psych profile. it doesn't lie does it? i mean it's like a self-fulfilling prophesy. how could it not come true. I'm sorry it's just not going to work out... which makes me feel sort of bad, but you and i both know, well- it's a moment and maybe, after it's over we can be friends.
Friday, November 10, 2006
I haven't watched Survivor yet, so in the meantime we should talk about The Office. So, the Scranton branch isn't closing after all! No one, aside from Jim's Stamford boss, seems to be leaving! Jim and Pam will be reunited! With, of course, the introduction of Jim's new chicky...who I like, there's nothing wrong with her, but she's not Pam. And I realize there must be tension in the plot to make a good story or whatever. But writers, please take note that this is a comedy, not a dramedy, so even if you must drag it out for a year or more, Jim and Pam must be together in the end. Thank you, and that is all.
I so, so look forward to Jim's return to Scranton, and his new position as Michael's second. I have so missed his live and in person torturing of Dwight K. Schrute. And even though faxes from Future Dwight to Present Dwight will likely cease, other amusements will take its place.
Any other thoughts?
Dear Jeff Probst,
I have to confess that The Office might now be my favorite show. Maybe it has been for awhile, and I just didn't admit it. Survivor remains, however, a close second, and my number one favorite reality show. I'm still sorry, though, if your heart is a little broken.
Still your fan 4-evah,
Thursday, November 9, 2006
Dear Other Computer,
I realize I just made you sound like crap. But please know that I fully realize it's me, not you. You had a fancy, newer version of the firewall that I just couldn't figure out. And frankly it was probably better that you were closed off to all those evil cookies or whatever. For now, though, as my patience has all but disappeared, I choose the evil cookies and the security settings just the way I like 'em.
XO from the WILDside,
Tuesday, November 7, 2006
so yah... report to work 6am. alright and um, yah, i'll uh, be there. uh.okay.
and i thought about what to do on my last day- as if tomorrow i was going into the army or, i don't know, dying or something... so what i did was go thru my 'life scraps' files, just to solidify the innate feeling, and realized i'd become completely calloused to memories (about a 1 1/2's worth). i ripped out about an inch worth of photos and old papers from existing albums and reluctantly posted photo after photo in my current one. i even caught myself thinking what a waste. i was horrified by my attitude. but it is an unpleasant reflex after spending a couple years with my grandmothers albums, when deducing someones life is a business and trying to figure out what to keep and save and still keep some semblence of them despite your harsh distillation... and then you know- i knew that i didn't want to par it down to nothing... so that there was just a series of random photographs- i think if i ever get back to doing something with the old ones, i will want it to tell a story of sorts... and it seems worth telling. i guess? and then i turned to look at my blog and was so grateful for the random story it seems to be telling- neatly, well-formatted and wonderfully present... and even though i'll die and someone may or may not care i have to say that it's a story worth telling to me- long after i've forgotten. it seems to be so, always after years pass, how much.
Monday, November 6, 2006
I was- i guess- feeling positive about life or "better" and so went into my interview at B------with a certain levity, almost perfectly at ease and chatty... that I didn't even ask how much they paid or what the hours would be until i'd already gotten comfortable with the idea of being there after a long and probably preferred absence from the retail industry. The answers sunk into my head but were trapped in a web of optimism and have been trying to make their way into the more cynical parts of my brain with some effort... they may be succeeding. But the man was so nice and he offered me the job on the spot and i accepted... against all my previous history and judgement. I don't know what i was thinking.
cynical grey matter: $7.50 an hour. 6am-2pm.
even as the obvious, repellent truth stands above, which on most days would be enough to curdle my brain and make me drop into unconsciousness, i feel almost calm about accepting it as my inevitable fate. my only possible salvation from working would be that i have to go camping and will be gone for 5 days... this should almost be enough to make sure i don't get hired since it's right before thanksgiving. but as i said, i forgot most things - and i certainly forgot that. so compelled by my conscience i will call the person who hired me and with cringing reluctancy mention the fated absense and if he relents i will acknowledge my fate and look forward to the silence of the store at 6 in the morning, and the discounts, and the paycheck no matter how meager, bcs something is still better than nothing? And if he declines then i will be released and continue to collect my $61 EDD check, and go to my mandatory "how to find work" meeting and look and look and look. Which you know I'll be doing regardless... in this unseasonably hot weather... and waiting for a way out... to get a job i really want... sort of like looking for love.
Sunday, November 5, 2006
anyway i'm home now, watery eyed, coughing, sniffing and wandering the garden which is about what- 30ft of visual entertainment and i've about had it. and i have to lounge like the ailing flower i am. of course i was laying there in my bra when i hear over the fence, dave, dave- which is my dads name, and luckily i had a shirt to slip on so i could go on over and tell them that he was upstairs... i hope i have more relevant things to say come my interview tomorrow at b------: for the inventory team... possible seasonal hire extrodinare?
(cough.whimper. sigh. close eyes...)
Saturday, November 4, 2006
Friday, November 3, 2006
Secretly, I was glad to see Ozzy stick around, even though clearly he's a big threat. He's likable, he's kinda hot, and he's a huge provider of not only fish, but coconuts--which he climbs all the way up the limbless trees for, and even a big bird. Although, the bird was kind of sad. I am and will forever be a carnivore, but man, the poor thing was sleeping when Ozzy grabbed him. Ozzy's contributions are also quite key in winning tribe challenges, or at least putting forth a valiant effort. He's likable enough as well that should he go far in this game, like say to to the Final Two, I don't foresee that the vote for the mil would be hard. At this point I'd venture to say that I'll be rooting for him in future eps. Provided he doesn't do anything stupid.
I was pleased during Tribal Council at the response to the question Jeff posed regarding the remixing of the tribes from racially divided to a mixed bag. The general consensus was that in the end, people will bond inexplicably based on personality, not race, that you just never know who you'll have chemistry/connection with, or why. Go figure. Common sense is so oddly refreshing these days.
Also "refreshing" must have been the wicked storm Adam was stuck in during his stay on Exile Island. Luckily the guy was smart enough to fortify the pirate ship prop and hide as well as he could. I'm definitely not so opposed to Adam as in previous weeks, despite his big, dumb frat boyness, though I'm not sure why... he hasn't seemed as attitudinous as he was previously? I guess we'll see.
- Playing with my Weeble Wooble treehouse.
- And other toys: cash register with big plastic coins and a return drawer, shopping cart full of plastic groceries, toaster with styrofoam toast.
- Vaguely, being in the hospital once with croup. Received: Woodstock and Snoopy to keep me company.
- Wandering idly through a basement store of fabrics.
- Swallowing a button.
- Playing Hide-and-Seek with the neighbor kids (or was it Tag?).
- A balloon received at an ice-cream social or somesuch, tied to my yellow dresser and deflating over the course of a few days.
- Taking flying leaps from the chair into the beanbag down in the den.
Thursday, November 2, 2006
user name = schu
Wednesday, November 1, 2006
thrown away: negatives, bad photos, boxes, papers, apple core
emptied out: raspberry/apple sauce (ew), thai peanut sauce, sugar jar
things cut: zinnias, dahlias, roses, bad thoughts.
cups of tea: 4
old letter to self: 1
Now, I fully expect a disaffected teenager or two to mope up to my door and sullenly, wordlessly hold out his Food Lion bag for a candy bar. Whatever. But last night, there weren't just disaffected teenagers, there were more than a handful of little kids, preteens, and teens without costumes. And having no money, if that is the case (which I am suspicious is not), is just not an excuse. There are ways to be creative without spending a dime, and many times a costume made out of the cardboard, poster paints, and coffee filters you found around the house are a lot more fun and impressive than something you could buy already made at the store. Either way--don't go trick-or-treating around the neighborhood costumeless, or encourage your kids to do so. It's pretty tacky.
In conclusion, even if you see the ritual as a stupid/commercialized/boring/weird product of culture, you could at least try to get into it. And if you're going to go so far as beg free candy off of your neighbors, the least you could do is plop a collander on your head, maybe fashion a cape from some Brawny paper towels, and tell me you're Captain Kitchen. Seriously. I don't ask for much.
That said, there were some good efforts put in last night by the neighborhood munchkins, and to them I say, witch-hats off.