A Sample Vacation in One Day

Today was going to be something else. I pictured kayaking thru light fog, the quiet lapping of waves against the harbor boats. A seal or two and a fistful of pelicans. But the forecast, 60degrees and possible showers, dissuaded me. I went south instead…

Sometimes you have the feeling that if you drive long enough, go far enough, experience things out of your element you’ll be rid of whatever is bothering you. You bring friends because they’re not you, they will say and do things that you don’t expect and this will further aid in the cleansing of whatever it is your trying to chase away. They’ll make you see things differently.

On the way down to San Diego we had 3 opportunities to change course but Santa Monica wasn’t far enough, Newport was too familiar, the timing wasn’t right for Disneyland so down down down we went toward the border. We saw some charred hills, stopped at starbucks, got gas at Costco all the while keeping up a friendly patter- certain notes my 2 friends hit would strike against each other. The redheads cynicism, the blondes idealic enthusiasm. Dissonance. I hadn’t ever thought what if they don’t like each other, what if they don’t get along. Not seriously anyway. But then again with birthdays only 3yrs and 1 day apart they might be too similar. Aries.

Luckily SD is redheads town. So I got to be Switzerland and blonde took up neutrality for the greater good of the group. We had some Hawaiian BBQ which I decided now, I just can’t get into no matter how hard I try- when we got there it was raining and we’d biked a loop on the boardwalk. Most everyone walked around undaunted. I tried to lock my bike with the U-lock- that always gains the upper hand on me. I can’t remember how it quite fits together, I drop the key, I can’t quite lock it in the right position. Removing the seat so it wouldn’t get wet left my hands full of grease splotches. My friends have ordered. I stand scraping the grease off with napkins that crumble to the touch. I get my drink and it fills, I accidentally hit it again and it pours all over the counter and the floor. I am making a quiet scene and I’m not sure my friends have noticed. I get my food and I see it’s a larger container. Redhead says, oh I forgot to tell you, regular is too large. Blonde hates the macaroni but tries to eat it anyway. I wisely had gotten fries. She adds soysauce in some flavor making attempt but sometimes mayo is just mayo and there’s no getting past it. We cringe. Don’t eat something you don’t like the taste of. It just doesn’t make any sense. She spits it out.

After lunch the sun is peaking out, sort of humidifies everything. Blonde unpredictably swerves and almost takes out redhead a couple of times. She doesn’t seem to see how startling a swerving bike might be. Redhead bikes ahead against the wind. I keep an even pace trying not to hit pedestrians or someone with the word clueless hovering over their head. I say oh, shit several times… and oh my god, I almost took that old guy out. Blonde goes slow, she goes fast. We shout at each other about the houses, gesture nods at the odd balls- like the guy on the bicycle that has biker handlebars, looks like he’s on autopilot, as in not at all awake. But it seems serene.

We stop and see battleships. Redhead thinks fighter jets would complete the scene. I said, what if a mushroom cloud appeared north over the horizon. Should we head for baja? Would it matter? Blonde bikes on ahead. Later, redheads bike breaks. The back wheel stops moving. She grinds to a halt. I take the bike from her and drag it for a while. Blonde wants to help. She scoots along, then trips up over the pedal and falls. Gives herself a nasty bruise. We stand amazed. I take the bike back again. We drop them off and she wonders if the bikes were made in China. What if they were I ask? At least the nimble little fingers making them can afford rice now. Blonde doubts it. Redhead and I laugh.

We decide to stop at Henrys. An organic market. Redhead is obsessed with chocolate covered peanut-butter filled pretzels. I hunt for cliff bars. 99cents. Strolling thru i remember my gingerpill obsession! A nausea test coming up soon I grab a bottle. I have been talking about them non-stop since march’s whalewatching trip. I’m happy. Blonde finds a box of fishoil- coreomega something or other, and flax… she is very concerned about her colon. We check out. Blonde takes out her greenbag but I insist on having my own paper bag- bcs I love them. It’s MY purchase. I want to walk away with a bag. It’s as simple as that. I love parcels and packages and no amount of ‘go green’ will dissuade me. Blonde seems disappointed. But paperbags are a wonderful textured glory and I use them for tons of other things. Blonde talks non-stop about her coreomega. Redhead plans our next move. I drive. Left. Right. Faster. Slower. Where was it you wanted me to go?

Balboa Park: The three of us chase a rock down a long colonnaded hallway. Passing it back and forth. We take pictures. We look at big roots. Blonde wonders if her shirt offends veterans. Redhead tries not to shoot deathrays at screaming children. Blonde complains about her shoes. Redhead says, this is where, and then we, I think we should go here. I read a sign. I look at the architecture. I smile.

We are already overdoing it.

We drive. And drive. To a place called Allejandro’s. Redhead has been talking about these burritos non-stop. Her tastes are simple. Refried beans, cheese. Fresh tortillas. Insanely cheap. This is not my idea of a burrito. Mine is meat filled and fancy. This one has some hidden tomato and a tease of green stuff but mostly cheap and pretty tasty meat. I can’t argue. Blonde I’m sure, is internally recoiling over the crap we’ve been eating all day. This is not a place with options. We all pull from a stringy gloriously greasy quesadilla. I think, I understand what redhead had wanted. What she always means when she says, burrito. Exactly. The thing she loves. I sip on what has to be my 4^th diet coke of the day. Redhead says, it doesn’t matter. We’re on vacation.

We drive home.

Blonde’s bladder is going to explode. We make it to the citadel – a small shopping outlet. We drop her off at the bathroom. We rejoin. She is at Forever 21. Redhead goes to Ann Taylor. I lay on a bench outside. I find my way to Eddie Bauer. Things are getting harder. We are all getting tired.

We hit traffic.

I skip through the radio stations. I skip through the cd songs. I try not to get us killed. I keep imagining the car cocking and rolling out of control into a crash. My heart beats faster. I blink. I drop off blonde. She says, I’m exhausted. I am too. She says she would come in but she’s allergic to the cats. And the dogs. And the dust.

But redhead and I watch Sound and Fury, a documentary on coqular? Implants. We talk about the day and the differences btw blonde and her. I cannot argue. I agree. I hope that somewhere in there was a good time. And how glad I am for once to have been lead around and shown a different world. And what a difference it makes. I see red clearly more than before. And how despite the noise I went somewhere I wouldn’t have gone otherwise… because now you see I have a story to tell about 2 friends and how far apart they are, and where I stand in between… and that what I was chasing, was a life outside the routine. And how each detail leads to character, each choice to a person, and without conflict there would be nothing to compare it to.