Tuesday, July 13, 2010

m,

I might not be able to get up off the couch tomorrow. We’ll see. BodyPump classes are just as scary as they sound. I still don’t really get it yet – the rhythm or whatever, and the gung-ho culture in the workout room – but I guess I have to keep going back and eventually it will stick? Which I suppose I will – if I can move ever again. It’s all conditional.

Raaaandom ponderings, because I know you want to know. Long-term relationships. I don’t mean the kind with people, necessarily. I’m realizing in the past year or so, I’ve begun several new long-term relationships. I thought long and hard about each of them before beginning, and plan for those relationships to last a really long time. Yoga. Church. Fighting slavery. Now running. The last of which I admit is still tenuous, because ugh, shin splits. Misery. But all have been slow but methodical roads, intent on building toward something I can explore as long as I’m able. There were and are honeymoon periods for each, as well as moments of disheartenment, joy, contentment, struggle, etc. And each are love relationships in a way. Journeys. And for better and worse, I’m fairly happy about each of them, and even the fact of making those deliberate choices to begin with.

On the flip side, everything’s just kind of dying outside. The ginormous tomato tree is knocking over the smaller, more reasonably-sized tomato plants with its sprawling-ness. The basil looks about done. Eggplants, cucumbers, cabbage, all the same. And the planter boxes have me worried – will the stuff come back, or maybe it’s their time…? And speaking of which, for the stuff that lies dormant over the winter and reappears in the spring, what do you do with it? Anything? Cut it back, water it? I’m so confused.

Oh, and the magnolia tree sapling burnt to a crisp. It’s a stab through the heart every time I wander out there.

But tomorrow we’ll meander over to the neighbors if it’s not raining and pick blueberries – even though K.Lo says, “I don’t like blueberries.” Maybe yoga – if I can move, of course. Or maybe even if I can’t move? I hear you’re supposed to push through the pain or something like that. Hope you remembered your chapstick.

xox

pen

4 comments:

somebody's mom said...

I'm proud of you for your exercise and feel your pain. (it's been years since I've taxed my muscles lie that)
It seems wrong to me that the garden should be dying when it is only July. Of course, the garden started early. Now for the plants that are perennials, maybe they should have water, maybe not. It varies. Not all perennials go dormant. Maybe the magnolia will yet come to life, don't rip it out yet. Did the soil dry out in the root zone or was it only that crazy heat that wilted the leaves?

pen said...

I haven't given up on the magnolia yet, even though everyone else has. I have hope. It maybe has dried out completely though, as the leaves are looking grim...

I should look up each plant and figure it out. Hoping it will either cool off or start raining.

Andria said...

we've finally had some rain here the past day or so, maybe it's headed your way. Supposedly dropping to 72 tonight! yay!!

mendacious said...

body pump? yikes.

and love the pondering of longterm relationships. hmm.