Pen,

I just got back from a Good/Holy Friday service. It was a little overproduced by I do love the writing our sins on flash paper and burning them up on the cross, and I'm a sucker for darkness and candles. It seemed appropriate also to the culmination of my meditations. Technically I have 2 more to go- tonight is a meditation on the last judgement and tomorrow is a meditation on hell... humm. *sigh. I may just be done with them. Or am i not willing to wait the agonizing hours to the promise of Christ risen? I'm simply tired of it too. Though today while writing I thought, the place where the enemy attacks is in weakness- where there are already foundational cracks. It seemed obvious once i said it, and appropriate to the last week. But maybe even though you think, ugh, sin and death and the fall of man again, it doesn't mean God isn't going to show me something.

In othernews I'm drinking hotchocolate and wearing my mourning necklace. I also had a pretty relaxed day of reading, writing!? part of my essay and getting a tan. So that was win/win. I hit a point where I just didn't want to think about my spiritual journey anymore- just at the point where it gets good- the current landscapes, healing and what not. But the fact that I started is very good news. Tomorrow I plan to work on it till I finish?? Maybe too ambitious as Rita is coming over and I'm helping her paint some mountainous landscape... most likely for the tomb or some such?

Also I got my ipod battery in the mail today. It looked not-new. Which sucked and the redwire was out of the little plug. So after watching the demo online i disassembled the ipod, looked at that battery, fixed my notsonew battery and right now it seems to be working. I felt very tech savvy, right to the point of wanting a medal or a photograph taken. And as every sunrise has some darkness behind it i got some letter from the edd about a phone interview, and not releasing my benefits until then, or if at all? Super awesome. There was some other sort of grim thing, like my stomach not liking the chocolaty/milk of the hotness i just had, or the fritos like led in my stomach earlier today, and needing to actually start walking for warriordash, or that one job i actually did want, is still hiring which means they dismissed me outright even though i'd be sort of awesome for it. But maybe its the awesome if i were someone else and not me, who makes necklaces and other things of the artistic not totally awesomely lucrative types... but did i mention my ipod? triumph? and maybe another bouquet in the works... sure i have to call her back, but now i have an ipod i can wander around with, while I think about calling her back, and write myself notes and lists saying: call her back, transplant the vine, finish the essay, etc etc.

m.