Thursday, November 8, 2012


I thank the Lord the week has veritably flown by in my mental imagination. Though let me tell you last night, I interrupt the students for talking- i am such a bad teacher- and Eun hee is like teacher, no, i'm telling a story about a student who die. What happened, I ask. Teacher, two friends at ara..highschool. The one girl, say let's both jump. on the ... do you know what is this? Yes, the roof, the ledge. Yes. (they are always surprised at how much i understand sometimes) Of school building. Why!? Scorecards perfect teacher, 80 and above in all subjects. So, we don't know. So, they are there. But her friend, she afraid. And she step down, and girl, while she falling, looking up, they see each other. Eyes. Looking, so she know. And friend she-- what is this-- faints. Yes, teacher, faints, and girl she die, knowing that her friend didnt' die with her. Yes, teacher. (Preceding this was one of my favorite students, Young-bin, asking me, teacher why is life so hard. And i pointed to the head and how it made trouble for us... (the heart also) but there was a gulf where no words of mine could cross.) So sad. Other students, Chin-cha!? (Seriously!/Really!) Heads nodding. And the tragedy of the two friends making eyecontact is so haunting and perfectly part of the korean drama. i don't know... Ok! Well let's go on to discuss descriptive words and the beauty of jeju...!

I was going to actually babble about more upbeat things. But i've managed to damper my own spirits just now even though i just licked the mug containing my delicious caffe latte. Inexplicable. Well ok understandable. But still. Ok list of things i'm looking forward to: pay-day, maybe some volleyball, a package from mom, maybe miscellaneous car rental for the weekend just because oh and to help Meaghan move... Or maybe next weekend, and purchasing ticket to vietnam on saturday after the paydaying goes through. Paying bills. Needing to start a list related to things not to miss now that i'm leaving. I've had further meditations on intimacy as related to the poem, but have no place to put them right now. And what else?

I had another class, suddenly (the girls of course), erupt into accusatory- Do YOU KNOW JEJU! They're only like 12 yrs old maybe? or maybe younger? I can never keep it straight.

These girls, I've come to love the class as a whole, but I am a little bit scared of them. There's 8 students now evenly divided and the girls were about to make me walk the plank. And i asked them- well what about jeju? Do I like it? What? And then i proceeded to list places i knew and the korean food i liked. And then they quizzed me about where places were. It seemed to satisfy them. Mullify them maybe? I don't know. Something's in the water this week. Or always but it just came to the surface. The same class that was talking about suicide made an inditement against the new k teacher that to end up here must mean that her education was very bad. There are sometimes that I wish i understood more and there are sometimes i dont want to hear at all. I'm sure that's with life across the board really. As vulnerable and ignorant as kids are they can be stupid and cruel. (STO) Stating the obvious. There i go again. It's just going to be that way isn't it. Back forth. Back forth.

And then there's headlice to add insult to injury. Having to sacrifice the sublime of handbells to the mess of infested hair. I shake my head exalting in the blue sky and wincing at the wind tattered leaves.


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