ho hey, ho hum

Good morning or evening, as the case may be,
At the moment I'm extremely restless, but this hasn't been the norm. No, it's more - wake up, J.Lo, so we can make some biscuits! and the puppy can quit clamoring for your presence already. And the coffee hasn't cooled enough to sip, and I'm too scared to open the biscuit can. And dagnabbit, the puppy keeps chewing on your shoes and my pillowcases. Oh my.

But anyway. Let's talk about madskillz in the Goodwill shopping dept. Ooo, I would so love to go to one or three of your Goodwills in LA. Because if I'm finding decent stuff here (The Loft! Old Navy! Express! J.Crew!) I can only imagine what I'd find there. So far I've added to my wardrobe for outrageously minimal expense: dress shoes, dress pants, a skirt, multiple shirts - some dressy but mostly casual, a sweater, a cardigan, a pair of cords and a pair of jeans. Some of it mildly flawed, of course (like how am I going to get the sharpie-d on price of $4.99 off the bottom of that one pair of shoes?), but some of it remarkably unworn looking. A month ago before I understood the sale system, I had tried on a bunch and wanted to walk out with it all, but then the sale items were explained, and I sighed and put most of it back. But then! I realized most of this stuff probably wasn't going anywhere, so each week I come back and pilfer the things that are currently $1. It's like a game, I admit, and I'm most amused by my take-home clothes-lotto winnings. And then - because I've done a barely adequate job of maintaining a proper wardrobe over approximately the last 10 years, I trade out - with the old. In with the new. All my shit goes back to Goodwill to possibly make someone else happy.

Whatelse. My interview was rescheduled for Tuesday @ 9:30 a.m. EST so everyone think Good Thoughts during that time. I'm waiting for ANTM to start again, even though I secretly hate it. I'm ready for spring! Because it looks like spring some days, but then it's just too chilly to abide. And the other day (maybe Thursday?) was completely gray, dank and like a weather personification of these crap-ass death colds that have been incessantly circulating around our family. J.Lo is on the mend and me too, but now the children are hacking. What on earth. Die germs! already.

I've been working on an article for a digital magazine, randomly, about traversing the world of organics, and segued in my research to find a CSA that we're totally going to join. Since we can do a quarter bushel every week for 24 weeks, for slightly more than $10/week. I feel like it's an awesome plan to supplement our garden yields.

Speaking of plants, I'm still devastated by proxy about your lot being taken all apart. All the symbolism and magic that went with it falls, also. So unfair.

I still have to blog about those creepy, I mean awesome, caterpillars. They're all in full chrysalis at the moment, waiting. evolving under wraps. And totally gross looking in their crunchy, gray, unassuming state. Well, but it's' true!

Ugh, now the children are demanding to be fed. How rude.
Will e you more in a bit - xo,
your penelaotang

penelope's terrible horrible no good very bad day

A bit hyperbolic for sure, but Saturday did pulse with expectation-fail and decision-regret. Like what was I thinking when, soothingly and cheerily, I was all, I'll stay with the dogs! No problem. And then sent the puppy-whisperer away with the children on their weekend.  I love my puppy, but my whispers do not yet reach her soul. At least the disciplinary ones. That's J.Lo's gift. So it was a day filled with accidents and sharp teeth and bitter tears. In retrospect, I realize two things - 1. it's so wicked cold out that outdoor trips are pleasant for no one; whereas the rest of the week hadn't been nearly so arctic, and 2. my dreams of all I'd get done or not done were way too large. Work? Psssh. Cleaning the kids' rooms? Ha. Also 3. Hormones. Duh. Why do I ever expect that to go well. I should have just had one thing on the list: Puppy. And everything else accomplished would've been cream cheese.

I did watch a fair amount of TV, however interrupted. And this morning I read. And it's been much calmer. Later if I can stand it, I'll go out and procure puppy tags that will make Sophie's collar jangle in an annoying but effective way, so I at least have an idea of where she is.

Oh, also, I took a long-talked-about trip to Goodwill in the next town over and found for $10 two pairs of Old Navy pj pants and a flannel J.Crew shirt that I absolutely adore. The fit, the softness, the color (green w/ white and pink) are a delight. Rural NC, you never cease to surprise me.

Church decoupage project: finished. Easter/Resurrection Garden prep: underway, at least in my mind. J.Lo built a planter box out of pallets (oh Pinterest, you're so magical with your ideas) and Thursday or so I'll go out to procure soil and plants and everything else. Oh, and rocks (to paint? I can't decide), I'll procure  more of those from the yard. Ideas welcome. Saturday is the day.

So now please tell me of your magical adventures with Cath! I want to hear everything. And see pictures. Although maybe you've posted some on FB; must go check.

love YOU,
penelope, not a vehicle or a puppy-whisperer, but still tentatively optimistic about the new day

someday

I was out shopping today and found a bucket of sticks on clearance for $7.50. I think it was 75% off. A damn good price for a bucket of sticks. I have always wanted one, I couldn’t tell you why. I can see it by a door, or in a corner somewhere, especially during the fall or winter months. The pot was an orangey red color, the sticks maybe between 2 and 3 feet tall. It was sort of perfect all around.

I put it in the cart and took it on a tour of the store, on the fence the whole time about the *need* for a bucket of sticks. Justifiable? After a several-year back-burner quest? Why not.

Then I remembered that N.Lo is 1, and on the verge of walking, and that there couldn’t possibly be a worse time to buy the bucket of sticks. Sure, he’d learn quick enough not to go near the thing. But would that be before after the sticks skewered his little eyeballs. It would be a disaster waiting to happen, I had to admit.

Someday I will own the bucket of sticks. Someday the planets will align on this matter. Just not, sadly, today.

Haul, by pen

Last night I went to the Famous Library Book Sale, this time all hard-core. I paid my $15 (tax-deductible) to join the Library Friends and therefore gain advance entrance. It was worth it. Amidst a crowd of box-lugging, wheelie-suitcase toting shoppers, I filled my bag* with:

1. A bunch of Boy Books for Scott. They’re the written equivalent of action movies. You know what I’m talkin bout.

2. Hardcover versions of Harry Potter 1 & 3 (I just need 2, now).

3. Reading Lolita in Tehran

4. The Memory Keeper’s Daughter

5. The Time Traveler’s Wife (LOVE it.)

6. Perks of Being a Wallflower

7. The Secret Life of Bees

8. Lucky

9. Red Tent

10. We Thought You Would Be Prettier

I have no room to spare on my bookshelves for these new adoptees, and a whole slew of books from previous book sales I hadn’t even gotten to yet. But I find it completely exhilarating, the LBS, kind of like Christmas. And I’ll get to them all eventually, especially now that I’ve been on a more intense reading streak of late. I’m kind of like the old-old me, with that, rather than the old me. Does that make any sense? Bah. I don’t have time to dissect, I have books to read!

*My bag, a heavy-duty paper one with rope handles from Eddie Bauer, fared so well for the duration of the sale, only to break 10 yards from the checkout, spilling my haul everywhere. Of course it did. I expect nothing less when in public. Clearly next time I’ve got to go canvas.

shirts recently purchased, by pen

I needed some new shirts (that actually fit? unbelievable concept, I know), and happened on a coupon on EW Mag for 80stees.com. It's a rad site. Here is the coupon, if you are so inclined!

Not that I don't love the earth

We've been pinching pennies lately, for several reasons: debt consolidation, lack of overtime hours, and oh, the fact that we have two children now. Gets expensive. So here are the some of things I've been doing that in another life I might have considered... fussy, boring, overly-involved, obsessive, over-the-top, impractical, plain old can't-be-bothered-with-it, etc. A lot of these make it sound like we're all Going Green with Al Gore, but no, we're just cheap bastards.


*I have severely cut our paper towel usage. Paper towels will be used only for things like... cooking bacon. For cleanups, I purchased a pack of microfiber cloths ($8.99 for 12, found in Target's automotive section) and throw them in the laundry when they're dirty. They wash well, although they tend to cling to the other clothes like velcro, which is a little weird. They do clean up better than paper towels, however, which I'm very impressed with.

*Items we really go through, I buy in bulk. Items we wouldn't go through if we have a half-ton of it around, I buy as needed. I'm very judicious about this fund allocation, and I do find more and more items switching over to the bulk list, because I am also getting very strict about finishing everything we buy.

*We use the front and backs of scrap paper, especially for K.Lo's art projects.

*We eat leftovers for lunch. Or sometimes, if I don't think we'll make it through the leftovers before they die, I put them in the freezer for a whole nother dinner.

*Nearly all of the kids' clothes are hand-me-downs or gifts. Every once in awhile I can't restrain myself, but I do try.

*I bought the light bulbs that last 7 years. But I won't use them in the fixtures I know will burn out long before the 7 years is up.

*Unless I take a trip, I only fill up my own car with gas maybe once a month. Because I never go anywhere far. (This one's sort of a lucky accident.)

*I use the aquarium water on the front-porch plants...which are dying because I need to water them in between, too, but that's another story.

*We wear a lot of clothes (pants, pjs, some shirts, not underwear for heaven's sake) more than once to cut back on laundry, only wash what's really dirty... which N.Lo helps along faster than we'd like. Babies are so messy.

*I make most of my own cleaning products. The only thing I don't make (yet) are laundry detergent and dishwasher cleaner. And furniture polish, but I'm really thinking about it. Oh, and granite cleaner, I probably will not make that, unless I find a good recipe. I have 2 multi-purpose sprays that also happen to be non-toxic. Dust repellant spray, shower cleaner, and general bathroom cleaner. I also use various product concoctions to clean the toilet and also the drains. I use straight vinegar to clean the coffee pot and also instead of Jet Dry in the dishwasher. I haven't had to make a glass cleaner yet, since I still have some store-bought on hand, but I will eventually.

*I downgraded our cable/internet package--oh wait, no, I upgraded it. Because it was actually cheaper to get the faster internet service, go figure. And that price is locked in now for 2 years, won't change even when everything goes to HD.

*We have the cheapest possible price plan for our phones, and never go over our minutes, and do not excessively text. Actually, the whole street could probably use our minutes and we still wouldn't go over, because I, as previously discussed in some other blog post of the past, am not a Phone Person, and we have rollover out the yang.

*We just switched trash companies, thanks to a hot tip from erinhjones. Servicetrash.com, baby. Ten bucks a month.

*We only give the kids baths once or twice a week. Oh wait, maybe that's just laziness. But seriously, too many baths dries out their skin anyway.

*And when I do give K.Lo a bath, I just plug the drain when I start the water running, and then mix it with the hot to get it the right temp, rather than wasting all that water at the beginning. I'm also considering (will I go this far?) getting a bucket and collecting unused water from the shower, like when you're waiting for it to heat up? But I don't know, it seems very hard core. But I could maybe use that for the fish tank, and the dying plants so maybe they'll live again.

*I never throw out gift bags, unless they're torn or whatever... and thusly never have to buy a gift bag. Same with tissue paper. And mailing envelopes/boxes.

*I also buy cards in bulk. Or at the dollar store, where incidentally, they cost less than a dollar.

*I buy books and music with gift certificates only, and otherwise they'll be used, like at the famed Library Book Sale, or on Amazon Marketplace. Or I don't buy a book at all, if I can get it at the library or borrow. Or burn, for music. And movies, I'm trying to not buy those at all, for the time being, and just rent from Netflix or ask for it for Christmas. Except with Dan in Real Life, I totally caved on that one, but it was my birthday we were celebrating.

*And, as you probably already well know, I am the bargain shopper. When it comes to pretty much everything.

So, welcome to my nerdy, cheapskate life. I share this list not to brag, or complain, or make you feel compulsive about your own life (god, please don't), but more just to catalogue our efforts? Because we are. Making an effort.

restraint

I am. A bargain shopper. It is in my blood. Probably you know this about me already. I enjoy the commercial hunt and kill. So it is especially difficult for me two days after Christmas to go to a store like, say, TARGET, and resist even looking at all the holiday decor that is currently 50% off. Not so much ornaments, because I so don't need to buy myself those. But wrapping paper, probably that would come in handy. Or maybe a lovely red table runner or whatever. I would use these things. But I don't need these things. The thing is, I have already bought myself these things. I just need to pay for them now.

So, a brief note to self:

Dear pen,

Don't do it. Think of the interest charges. The children. How long it will take that item to rot in the landfill. Whatever you need to think to keep on walking, think it. The time is now.

xoxo and godspeed,
penelope

pen's pseudo-shame

I'm a girl, I'm fickle. Subject to whims. And the other day on the way to the grocery store, one such whim overtook me, a whim laced with dread, curiosity, and a touch of hope. Partly the whim stemmed from my lifelong quest to Always Find the Best Deal, to Slay the Dragon of Commerce. Put a sword through his blackened little heart. And partly, that post from the other day was blinking in my brain and suddenly I decided to go to the Wal-Mart.

I haven't shopped, really shopped, at Wal-Mart in years. I have been occasionally to Wal-Mart, mostly with the company of more seasoned and brave and loyal Wal-Mart shoppers who are convinced it is the best store in the world. I, it is well-known, am a Target girl. I used to go to the Wal-Mart, a long time ago, used to love it. I used to go with friends on a Friday night wearing pajama pants and shop for chocolate and crafts. Yeah, I was one of Those Girls. Then Wal-Mart started seeming very ugly to me. The lights, the sheer volume, the people. I became a total Wal-Mart snob. The nails in the coffins were as such: reports of violent crime in the parking lot. A 600-lb, wheelchair-bound man using food stamps to buy ice cream. Waves of screaming children crashing through the aisles at 10PM on a Friday night. The air. The lights. The rising feeling of panic every time I stepped in the store. The inability to breathe properly. Perusing the aisles, realizing on multiple occasions that what I needed to finish up my shopping list was Back There, on the other side of the store, in an aisle I had already been to twice.

Wal-Mart. I know they have deals there, that in particular it is the best place to buy canned goods, and baking goods. Bread goods. Probably all the goods. But I had decided long ago that the emotional cost of shopping there far outweighed the financial rewards.

As I say, though: whims. Suddenly I am navigating the parking lot, trying to find a spot within half a mile of the store entrance, preferably close to a shopping cart dropoff. I find a spot. Load up the kids in the cart and go. I stick to the Grocery Side, block out the RestOfIt. Pick out some produce, make our way over to the meats. Decide to tackle the aisles all in order, because I don't yet know where anything is. Only get lost a few times. Only Have Words with K.Lo a few times. She says the word "bike" a million times, in a little voice like it is a question, and I respond as such: Yup, it's a bike. Say Hi, bikes. Look at the bikes. No, no bikes. We're not going to look at the bikes. We can ride by the bikes. Hi, bikes. Tires and streamers on the bike. Bye, bike. Another day, bike. No, we are not going back to the bikes. We cannot look at the bikes. Sit down, we are not looking at the bikes anymore, bye, bikes. Here, eat some Oreos at 10 in the morning and stop talking about bikes.

Why, in the fucking Dairy Aisle, are there bikes.

An older man, possibly nice, possibly a freak, suggests that K.Lo is weird, can't say any words other than "bike." They talk about it. She gives him A Look. We move on. They don't sell large containers of Scotch Guard as I expected them to; Wal-Mart is falling short. Salsa, though, is uber-cheap. As is sweetened condensed milk, all the cereal, yogurt, and margarine by the tub. Pasta Roni is priced regularly like it is on sale at The Other Grocery Store. The kids are being only marginally whiny, and we're doing this, making our way through. We are still alive and only a tiny bit panicky here in the Wal-Mart. Some fellow shoppers are even friendly, smiley, say hi to my babies. Some are surly, with a level of hostility you just don't find at Target. At least not on a weekday. If you're lucky. Some things are priced the same as all the other stores, not so impressive. The cart fills. We'll get this and this and this and this, too, so we won't have to go Anywhere Else for the next week or two. Since they have it here. Since they seem to have everything (except bulk containers of Scotch Guard) here at the Wal-Mart.

We check out. The cashier is sort of friendly, sort of not. The cashier/bagger on the next aisle is ranting like a Brickyard Preacher, totally for show, except he's complaining about Whatever, not preaching, and I try to ignore him, try to breathe regularly. Kind of hate Wal-Mart. Kind of am impressed by Wal-Mart. Wish the carts were bigger at Wal-Mart. Wish the carts were bigger everywhere, not just at Wal-Mart. But $89 would not have bought me this much at any other store.

We live. We went to Wal-Mart.

I give it 3 stars, out of 5. I might go again. Yeah, I would probably shop there again. But would I tell you, would I brag about it, would I say I am a Wal-Mart shopper. No. No, I couldn't. It seems like that would be going too far.

best book sale finds

I went to Day 1 of the Famous Book Sale yesterday, which, being a cheapskate, I have never done before. The price slashes start today, so I'm thinking I will go back Monday or Tuesday just to see what I can find, as per usual. This time around, though, and possibly forevermore, I had to try the first day. Just Because.

I walked away with:
Lisey's Story, Stephen King (for J.Lo)

Nature Girl, Carl Hiaasen (ditto)

three Can't-Help-Myself chick-lit books: Legally Blonde, Something Borrowed, and Something Blue

A Million Little Pieces, Frey, to finally hop on that train and see what all the fuss is about

Bel Canto, Ann Patchett, because I really liked the other two things I read by her...but did you see her latest release and the El Sucko reviews? Yikes.

On Beauty, Zadie Smith--I've been seeing this book everywhere, for some reason, and feel like it's a sign. Don't really know what it's all about.

And lastly, for K.Lo, a few Elmo books, Goodnight Moon (how she gone 20 months without owning this?), another Clifford book about the beach, and this fantastic lift-the-flap ABC book that's giant and pretty and in great condition.

Yay!

In short, made out like a bandit, and only felt slightly woozy toward the end of the sale, with my big belly and my big ol' box of books.

Fun with Iron on Transfers

In order to illustrate my own well grounded sense of self, i've made t'shirts bearing my name which are worn by myself. and shown to the generally amused populace. i created the masterpieces of uh me, by pulling up different forms from microsoft publisher and putting in the sundry details.

also for an extra dash of elitism i threw in some latin phrasing: ex abundantia enim cordis os loquitur. .. which means "out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks". it's sort of like a warning i think or maybe hope. depending on which way my heart seems to be leaning.

good times had by all. it makes me extra cool right? i hope so because that's totally like what i wanted and some stuff. plus i got the shirts at a deal. from an obnoxious $40 to $20.

sometimes it does pay to rove for deals, sure it only took me 4 or 5 years to get around to it but hey, check this one off the 'to do' list!! hurrah!

give me some time pen and you'll totally be sporting one too... hopefully it won't take as long but i can't promise anything.

purchased

Like Megs, I went to the Library Book Sale and am rather pleased with my purchases. Part of me wants to go back when it's the yard sale on Thursday and buy books by the foot, but the more sensible part of me says to stay home and be happy with my already overstuffed shelves. Along with an armload of now-and-later books for Bug, including a Clifford, Amelia Bedelia, and a lot of Sesame Street, as well as a handful of boy books for J.Lo, I procured the following fine mix of literary and girly pop fiction. I can only hope that the highbrow mendacious will at least partially approve...

Bergdorf Blondes, Plum Sykes
Patron Saint of Liars, Ann Patchett
The Cheer Leader, Jill McCorkle
Girl With Curious Hair, David Foster Wallace
Just Between Us, Cathy Kelly
The Love Machine, Jacqueline Susann
Blessed are the Cheese-Makers, Sarah-Kate Lynch
Love Monkey, Kyle Smith

Total of all purchases (24 books)? $10. Woohoo for the Library Book Sale!

bonus!

Once you start thinking about personal facts and weirdnesses, it's difficult to stop.

6. Yesterday I found a DVD 2-pack of Chasing Liberty and Raise Your Voice for $9.49 at Costco, and squealed at the sight of it. I feel no guilt (monetary) or embarassment (dork factor) whatsoever that I made the purchase. It was a true bargain and I intensely love most movies starring Mandy Moore and Hilary Duff.

7. I am not a Phone Person. Have I blogged about this before? Probably. I have exactly 2 phone friends that I will regularly pick up for, and I do speak with J.Lo just about every day. I also talk to my dad once a week on Sundays, for between 5 and 10 minutes, because he's not a Phone Person either. It's quite genetic. Everyone else, it's so not that I don't love you. But I will screen all calls and if I'm feeling at all awkward, grumpy, busy, or unorginal, I won't pick up. I only feel slightly remorseful--a touch more if I am unable, within approximately 2 days, to shed said awkwardness, grumpiness, business, or unoriginality and muster up the nerve to call you back. I'm an emailer. I like email. Email me.

8. I could eat pasta every day of the week and be more than okay with that.

9. I've been trying to cut out extraneous snacking lately, and through a ginormous show of inner strength, have not purchased new chocolate for the house in a few weeks. I'm worried, however, because there is currently only 1 chocolate peanut butter Hershey's kiss left, and I don't know what I'll do tomorrow after I eat it and still feel like I haven't met my Chocolate Quota for the day. I have a Chocolate Quota, and physically cannot make it if I do not have at least a few pieces within a 24-hour period. I think I should probably go out and buy some more, and just try not to devour it by the giant handful. For society's sake.

10. I watch shows on Noggin, or as it's called after 8 PM, The N, and I'm sad that no one else seems to. I watch Degrassi: The Next Generation and Beyond the Break, and sometimes they make me cry.