m,

Hello you. Whatcha up to in NYC, other than eating dinosaurs and lamenting the lack of handi-wipes? Did you find some whimsy?

I have a vague rattle in my chest that may be invented. The fish tank is vaguely drizzly sounding, which is how it all starts – you now well now the plight of the rushing water, the dreaded cleaning chore that looms. And my phone battery, which was charged just yesterday and barely used today, is down to 2 bars. What up with that.

This week is going as predicted, which is to say that it’s crazy-ridiculous-busy in a time of hormonal strife. I’m requesting strength and similar good thoughts and vibes and somehow I may pull it all off. Details, schmetails, you don’t need ‘em. I’ll let you know how it all turns out.

J.Lo bought a bag of clementines that are tasty, but my hand is a magnet for pulling out the few that are rotten and moldy. There’s a piece of cake left in the fridge that I can’t decide whether to eat. The kids ask about you, ask to play the Wii even more and K.Lo seems still to be processing that I was gone for a few days. Today she said, “I missed you, Mommy.” She also says “You’re the best mommy, ever.” Which is super-sweet and cute and feel-good until she reverses it.

I mean, obviously it’s the great mystery of the Universe, but I can’t wrap my brain around the idea of “gone.” Like how is that even possible. Or real. Like the fish at the aquarium – I just don’t get it. Occasionally, my brain travels down some rabbit hole, wondering. Sometimes the train of thought is panicky, sometimes not.

I’m fully adjusted by now to DST, but does that make it right?

Oh, another thing we missed was yoga. Sadness. I think you would have enjoyed bodyflow. And that yoga mat strap is a wonderment, I tell you. Why I didn’t spend $9 10 months ago is beyond me. It’s like a purse! I don’t even notice it. So much better than N.Lo + 2 blankies in one arm, and 2 mats in the other.

I want to work on my arm muscles, but feel no motivation really whatsoever.

Also, the plants still look lovely. The creeping phlox so far promises to be *rad.* Ben Folds and perhaps PF Changs await – 2 more days!

until next time,

pen