Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Reason #562 Why I’m a Phone-Phobe, by pen

9:30ish last night, the phone rings. It’s a local number, but not one I recognize or have saved to my contacts. I hate answering Unknowns, but then they call again. Maybe it is someone I know, and they really need to speak to me? Plus, J.Lo always makes fun of me for screening calls, especially the Unknowns, because he thinks it’s fun to talk to people he doesn’t know. So there’s an unspoken challenge there, and in spite of serious trepidation, it impels me to open the phone.

Me: Hello?

Chickie: DO YOU KNOW ANTONIO?

Me: No, I’m sorry, you have the wrong number...

Chickie: I KNOW YOU’VE BEEN TEXTING MY BOYFRIEND, AND IF YOU DON’T QUIT, YOU AND I ARE GOING TO HAVE WORDS.

Me: Uhhhh. I don’t know who you’re talking about, but it’s not--

Click.

Me: …me?

And sadly, the only thing I could think to say after that, had the conversation continued, would have been, “I don’t even know how to text!”

I’m just not good on the spot. But I like to imagine Chickie scrolling through Antonio’s text inbox later on and realizing that um, duh, she totally just bitched out the wrong person.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Whoa! How crazy was it for you to have a job in a big customer service center!

If she calls again, you could slip into computer message voice and ask her if she can help you with a crossword puzzle, what's a five letter word for a female dog?
not original, but what the hay.

ashley said...

I was actually telling someone the other day about what good not-phone friends we are! ;) I had a message not too long ago from a woman who said, "I was playing with my new phone and I dialed the wrong number. Um...shit." It was classic.

mendacious said...

ooo but it makes a good story!

penelope said...

i totally depend on my friends to understand that frequent phone calls will probably not be in the cards. :) although m has weaseled her way into being one of my three phone friends. you might ask her for pointers; i'm guessing persistence and patience, as well as the refusal to accept my phobia, are key.

the call center scarred me! clearly. i do like the crossword puzzle approach and will have it at the ready, should there be a next time.

Anonymous said...

Ha. Funny! I usually don't answer numbers I don't recognize. Especially since my number is apparently one digit off a hotel in Texas or some stupid thing. (I think it's recent, since I didn't start getting as many random calls from across the country until this summer.)

I too have only a few people I'll talk to for any length of time on the phone, so I don't think your point of view is too odd :)

Anonymous said...

Ohhh, and reminded me of a good story. My boss last year got a call from some random girl who wanted him to tell her boyfriend that she hasn't been cheating on said boyfriend with my boss...but somehow his number was saved in her phone.

penelope said...

Thanks for making me feel more normal. :)

Anonymous said...

This happened to me not that long ago. The person kept calling me Ashley and wouldn't believe me when I said that wasn't my name. She was accusing me of calling someone named Joe. I thought it was fun but also wish I were quicker on my feet. I should have said sure this is Ashley and Joe and I are meant to be and you better watch your back.

But just like you, I got freaked out and hung up.