Things, M

Things that have made me cry at work, when in fact i am usually an emotionless robot:

Li@n being killed by hunters in Africa.
D@lphins being slaughtered in a closed bay in Japan.
Eleph@nts dying in pain bcs they're kept in cramped zoos with no yard space and developing behaviors that are them going crazy.
E@gle kept in a closet, and didn't know how to fly, although he was rescued and rehabilitated.
Cheet@h trying to save a baby chimp, but the baby dies.

Oh so, to answer Kudzu's question: I'm working on this new NinmalAy LanetPay show and we're going to be putting together some amazing footage of close calls, harrowing rescues and man thrashings. Basically youtube anything with @nimal @ttacks, or @mazing video and there's a chance we're trying to hunt down the owner of the video and get an interview to find out what happened. For 3 wks work has been slow except for a steady pace of plodding thru and today i got an additional assignment of researching for the writers- so i'm psyched. But still, that's when i ran across the lephantEay articles and with my zoo visit fresh in my mind... I was like wahhhh, set the lephantEays free. And bcs of the LaZo@ our tax money is $40million in the hole just to be able to say we have @lephants, when they could be wandering in a sanctuary- is sort of infuriating. Usually I stay away from anything remotely sad but then suddenly you know its @himpanzee's in cages, and @nimal testing and its all i can do to not be totally bummed out. This gig will last till July and as with them all I hope it'll go somewhere but you know how it goes. And meanwhile, all sorts of grrr is brewing bcs of these poor animals and by association humans and I'm suddenly wanting to boycott things like the @lympics and zo0s and japan (of course) but I don't know what to do with my new found refreshed sense of outrage.

I could never paint the walls Oyster Bisque

After long last, I have decided that our kitchen will be YELLOW. It seems like a nice, happy, very kitcheny color that I can live with. Now, what shade. It's going to be pale, and decidedly not like a pencil. I've got a bunch of chips, and really at this point it's all about names. Because when someone asks you, "What color is it?" you can't very well say, "It's called Sludge of Buttercup," or something like that. Whoever has the job of naming paint colors can't take it very seriously, because when you're down to the nitty-gritty shades, isn't it so random? But for the person deciding what will end up on the wall, there's all sorts of potential there. It's like you're titling the whole feel of a room, and what you want to think of whenever you're in there, living your life and cooking up things.

So, here's what I'm down to:
Zest
First Light
Sunbeam
Pineapple Cream
Lemon Butter
Warm Summer
Yellow Narcissus
Pecan Cream
Lemon Cream
Lemon Sorbet
Daisy Spell
Cocoa Butter
Orchard Ladder

What do you think?

Not that I don't love the earth

We've been pinching pennies lately, for several reasons: debt consolidation, lack of overtime hours, and oh, the fact that we have two children now. Gets expensive. So here are the some of things I've been doing that in another life I might have considered... fussy, boring, overly-involved, obsessive, over-the-top, impractical, plain old can't-be-bothered-with-it, etc. A lot of these make it sound like we're all Going Green with Al Gore, but no, we're just cheap bastards.


*I have severely cut our paper towel usage. Paper towels will be used only for things like... cooking bacon. For cleanups, I purchased a pack of microfiber cloths ($8.99 for 12, found in Target's automotive section) and throw them in the laundry when they're dirty. They wash well, although they tend to cling to the other clothes like velcro, which is a little weird. They do clean up better than paper towels, however, which I'm very impressed with.

*Items we really go through, I buy in bulk. Items we wouldn't go through if we have a half-ton of it around, I buy as needed. I'm very judicious about this fund allocation, and I do find more and more items switching over to the bulk list, because I am also getting very strict about finishing everything we buy.

*We use the front and backs of scrap paper, especially for K.Lo's art projects.

*We eat leftovers for lunch. Or sometimes, if I don't think we'll make it through the leftovers before they die, I put them in the freezer for a whole nother dinner.

*Nearly all of the kids' clothes are hand-me-downs or gifts. Every once in awhile I can't restrain myself, but I do try.

*I bought the light bulbs that last 7 years. But I won't use them in the fixtures I know will burn out long before the 7 years is up.

*Unless I take a trip, I only fill up my own car with gas maybe once a month. Because I never go anywhere far. (This one's sort of a lucky accident.)

*I use the aquarium water on the front-porch plants...which are dying because I need to water them in between, too, but that's another story.

*We wear a lot of clothes (pants, pjs, some shirts, not underwear for heaven's sake) more than once to cut back on laundry, only wash what's really dirty... which N.Lo helps along faster than we'd like. Babies are so messy.

*I make most of my own cleaning products. The only thing I don't make (yet) are laundry detergent and dishwasher cleaner. And furniture polish, but I'm really thinking about it. Oh, and granite cleaner, I probably will not make that, unless I find a good recipe. I have 2 multi-purpose sprays that also happen to be non-toxic. Dust repellant spray, shower cleaner, and general bathroom cleaner. I also use various product concoctions to clean the toilet and also the drains. I use straight vinegar to clean the coffee pot and also instead of Jet Dry in the dishwasher. I haven't had to make a glass cleaner yet, since I still have some store-bought on hand, but I will eventually.

*I downgraded our cable/internet package--oh wait, no, I upgraded it. Because it was actually cheaper to get the faster internet service, go figure. And that price is locked in now for 2 years, won't change even when everything goes to HD.

*We have the cheapest possible price plan for our phones, and never go over our minutes, and do not excessively text. Actually, the whole street could probably use our minutes and we still wouldn't go over, because I, as previously discussed in some other blog post of the past, am not a Phone Person, and we have rollover out the yang.

*We just switched trash companies, thanks to a hot tip from erinhjones. Servicetrash.com, baby. Ten bucks a month.

*We only give the kids baths once or twice a week. Oh wait, maybe that's just laziness. But seriously, too many baths dries out their skin anyway.

*And when I do give K.Lo a bath, I just plug the drain when I start the water running, and then mix it with the hot to get it the right temp, rather than wasting all that water at the beginning. I'm also considering (will I go this far?) getting a bucket and collecting unused water from the shower, like when you're waiting for it to heat up? But I don't know, it seems very hard core. But I could maybe use that for the fish tank, and the dying plants so maybe they'll live again.

*I never throw out gift bags, unless they're torn or whatever... and thusly never have to buy a gift bag. Same with tissue paper. And mailing envelopes/boxes.

*I also buy cards in bulk. Or at the dollar store, where incidentally, they cost less than a dollar.

*I buy books and music with gift certificates only, and otherwise they'll be used, like at the famed Library Book Sale, or on Amazon Marketplace. Or I don't buy a book at all, if I can get it at the library or borrow. Or burn, for music. And movies, I'm trying to not buy those at all, for the time being, and just rent from Netflix or ask for it for Christmas. Except with Dan in Real Life, I totally caved on that one, but it was my birthday we were celebrating.

*And, as you probably already well know, I am the bargain shopper. When it comes to pretty much everything.

So, welcome to my nerdy, cheapskate life. I share this list not to brag, or complain, or make you feel compulsive about your own life (god, please don't), but more just to catalogue our efforts? Because we are. Making an effort.

observation

Okay, I'm not by any means suggesting that I am a perfect driver, but for fuck's sake, people. When you're backing up, do you even look? Just because you're in a handicap spot doesn't mean there's not going to be someone behind you. In fact, in a parking lot, chances are high that someone will be behind you.

This morning I'm at Costco, and as I finish up loading the car, I notice two ladies getting into their car in the next row over. That's right, I noticed. Because I tend to do that. I'm also not suggesting that I am oblivion-free, but shit. Being me, I'm already thinking ahead, and planning to let them go first, since they're already in their car, and I'm not in a hurry, and I can take a few moments and let them back out/get out of the way first. I wait, and they're not moving, their reverse lights aren't even on, so I think, "Oh, they're probably waiting for me, because my reverse lights are on." So I back out. And clearly they didn't even notice me, period, much less think ahead, much LESS follow basic fucking traffic protocol and LOOK BEHIND THEM before pulling out. Just as I'm practically bumper to bumper with them and about to pull the car into drive, Jackhole starts backing out, and keeps going! There's no time or room for me to get out of the way, so I'm left to honk my horn wildly and try not to swear too loud in front of the children.

How can you not even fucking look in your rear-view mirror? There are people and carts and cars and kids in parking lots! What a fucking jackhole. She's backing up, and I'm already in my mind's eye seeing us standing outside our cars, surveying the damage and exchanging insurance information. And me trying not to fucking punch the jackhole's lights out. LUCKILY, she stops in time, doesn't hit me, but by a fucking hair. Sometimes, I really hate people.

woh,

oh my gosh, woh. i know. it's a shock to me too. and so appropriate to my job right now. poor little animals. i mean seriously- there's an island off japan that slaughters dolphins 6months out of the year. it's beyond gross and inhumane and there's youtube footage of it. oh, it just changed to from humane society to weight watchers. whatevs! anyway, here to the right we have some blog-her ads... sort of like when we did adsense back in the beginning days. you'll adjust. or at least that's what i tell myself- and we get the added bonus of being in like some crazy cool blogHER community, because we're beyond rad. so really it's just another way of celebrating us because we do that.

Blogforever.
Blognation.

things are going to be messy for awhile.

I have the biggest trouble accepting this fact. Things are just going to be messy for awhile. The floors, the cabinets, the drawers. The closets. My clothes, the kids. I mean, we're not slobs by any stretch. There's the prevailing dog-hair issue, but I've come to terms with that one more or less. And I'm having the big yard sale in a week and a half, so a lot of the excess will be cleared out then. But the nitty-gritty organization? Having all my pictures ordered and in albums, clearing out every article of clothing that we're not wearing anymore because it doesn't fit or is too ratty or whatever. Making sure there's no furry M&Ms under the couch. Or that I haven't stuck my foot in my mouth. Can't worry about it (too much). Having everything all situated and organized and each thing in its place? Things like that aren't goingto happen for awhile. And regimented exercise, that's going by the wayside, too.

It's a huge pet peeve of mine when people say they're too busy, too busy, because you know, you have time for the people and things you want to make time. I'm going to say it, though, about the nitty-gritty level of organization, the control and order, and the exercise: I'm too busy! We've got stuff going on here. Two little persons with their demands and quirks and personalities. Needs. Not to mention two adults who need downtime and sanity and fun and things like that. So in the back of mind, while it does drive me a little insane that I can't address what I would noarmally address, if I didn't have the two little persons around? I've just got to let it go. Let the dust pile up.

todays accounts

greetings from the far off place that is workland. there is a literal crows nest on the top of the palm tree outside one of the office windows (5th floor), it's pretty spectacular. today i've been stricken with some wicked allergies that are throwing off my equilibrium- making me dizzy and nauseous. it's good times. just now with an hour to go it occurs to me that the ginger pills would've helped- had i remembered them. i also casually asked the guy who hired me what i should do once i ran out of footage to search and he sort of flippantly but humorously said, well without footage there's no show so! but then he said, I can ask so n'so if he needs help... uh, okay. how has he not realized that i've been stringing out the footage search for 2 wks because i'm really good at killing time. but as far as i know he's planned to employ me for 4 months. coolio. just a few hours ago i overhead a guy talking on the phone about being in jail, having a suspended license and harassing some girl about a guy she liked who is also going to jail in the twin towers (downtown)... and then i thought, well if he could find a job! there's hope for everyone i know. of course there is no magic formula to getting all these jobs i keep getting and i'm not even a felon... but i figure usually forces align and the right person hires you for something you've actually applied for. later i was going to help count the homeless population in hollywood but i'm bailing due to feeling completely gross- that and they have enough people so i don't feel so bad. in light of this i may now go eat some chinese food and write... swimming and other altruistic things to come when i feel better. oh and i think my left foot 2nd toe is broken but from like a long time ago. or maybe it's just bruised. either way it's totally annoying.

do-gooding and the peace of mind it brings

I'm old now and clearly have no idea how to properly spend a gift card. I bought mostly groceries with mine, is that bad? It's just that money's a little tight right now, and I reasoned that a little less pressure on our bank account would be a good happy birthday present. A nerdy present, but a present nonetheless. I won't share my grocery list, but I thought for a moment I could indulge in a little daydream fantasy about the things I considered buying instead.

Waitress on DVD
some wacky t-shirts
underwear (also slightly nerdy)
a purse
another big CD album because I like to organize (okay, that's really not much better, is it)
Sydney White on DVD
a dress to wear to N.Lo's Baptism
some music (unspecified, couldn't really think of anything)
socks?

Hmmm. This really isn't much a daydream, is it. Seriously, that's about all I could come up with. And while virtual shopping in my mind was kind of another gift in and of itself, I have to say, the groceries were totally worth it. I felt good about it afterward. Very Responsible, and a little Less Neurotic. It's like the best gift money could buy.

Sacrifice

I actually baked you guys. Serious accomplishment, since I never do these sorts of things. And from scratch. As if I'd make redvelvetcake from a box. Though Amber totally helped on this point and then mom made the topping more whipped or whatever the way it was suppose to be because it was all glazy and random. If you remember I occasionally talk about how I celebrate the church calendar- those lofty high holy days so that traditional celebrations like Christmas and Easter can actually have more meaning. And that the symbols present are more poignant and visceral because of it. LauraLee asked me to help think of things to incorporate into our new traditions. For instance she decided to live by candlelight from Thurs-Sat night to symbolize our movement as people from darkness to life- spiritually, emotionally. And most of us got the, it's a day of mourning, so we'll wear black, sort of thing. On the fly I suggested RedVelvetCake because of its shocking and slightly morbid red color- figuring that it symbolizes Christ's sacrifice for us and in turn by eating the cake how we as Christians willingly accept this sacrifice and partake of it. Then I brought bloodorange juice... well you get the point. And when I went to explain it, just as simple as that it seemed much more important to me than it did at first. Anyway, it was an awesome time and we conversed a lot about the intimacy of grief, the role of women, how we mourn, our voices as we sang, prayed, and our general fabulousness on this Great Saturday, before the promise fulfilled. And everyone or most anyway, loved the cake and they ate it up and that was just nice, though next time I'll use less oil and more food dye. And I think because I made something, had to think about it, figure it out, it made me more mindful of why we were gathering, celebrating easter in the first place, since it goes way beyond bunnies and families, though i did make an easter egg mobile, and eat some bunny shaped chocolate. Mainly because I'm still part pagan. Totally.

Back together again

Hello Allo. The picture doesn't do the transformation justice but it's just nice to have color and clean ones at that. And not old painted walls but new ones with no marks of any kind. Hurray to that.