dear wardrobe,

It's time we have a serious chat. As you well know, we haven't been getting along for quite some time. Not that we're fighting exactly; I would just call the relationship "unharmonious." You have a few pieces that I regularly hang out with, take to lunch, and what have you. But the majority of your numbers have been on strike for awhile now. It's finally sinking in that we need to face our issues and if needed, part ways. Because... I'm thinking, now that I'm prego, it's going to be quite a long time before I can even think about trying to wear those shirts and pants that I'm still not able to wear as a result of the first go around. I feel like it's more of a shape issue, in the end--that it's not so much the weight hanging on, but that your body just forever changes shape. And I've got to stop denying...

I bought a very nice mauvey shirt yesterday at Target in the size I would have worn before, though, and it gave me great hope. It made me think that it was possibe to get along with shirts, new shirts that actually fit the right way. Shirts that are long enough, for one, and shirts that could not double as a corset. And as much as it pains me to think about saying sayonara to my red Curious George shirt of yesteryear, I'm kind of thinking that by the time, if ever, I'm the right "size" to wear it, I'm probably not going to want to anymore. First of all, at that point, it will be years old. It's already kind of ratty. Actually, I think it was kind of ratty after the first time I washed it. WHY am I feeling bad that I can't properly wear this thing? Seriously... All these shirts I'm thinking of pink-slipping are on the ratty side, no wonder they don't fit right. Dear lord. Okay, that's IT, we're cutting the cord:

Goodbye to:
red Curious George
yellow UNCW shirt with hanging threads
bright green Tinkerbell with peeling graphics
electric orange Old Navy shirt I haven't even worn since... like, I can't even remember! WHY is it still in my drawer.
John Bender shirt? okay, maybe I'll save that for K.Lo
orange camping shirt with fabric so thin it's falling apart in my hands
brick Bonnie's Snow Lodge shirt, peeling graphics
another red graphic T that was tight and uncomfortable when I bought it 4 years ago, much less after it was washed once--and the seams are totally crooked
black tank-top that always looked terrible on me anyway

And others. There will be many others. And then the pants, and the sweaters, and the long-sleeve T's and jackets. And maybe even the SHOES, just for kicks, hahaha. Look out wardrobe. Management is cracking down.

xoxo,
pen with eyes wide open, now