Monday, September 3, 2012

large kopi latte

so we almost made it a month. i mean that 31st part is really irrelevant right anyway? you went camping. my flatmate broke her face. so we were distracted. it's the last days of summer. you got rained on. i spent it in the hospital. oh and today they decided to go ahead and fire her. so who doesn't want to be in the hospital - in the stroke ward- strangely... surrounded by old people in precarious health (literally dying around you, just yesterday), without family, with your jaw wired shut so you can only mumble and eat shit thru straws where you don't speak/sort of understand the language and then be told you dont have a job to come back to and that you have to find a new one to a. keep that all important insurance and b. stay in the country and c. pay bills. but whatever. oh and trying to find a job and talk to recruiters and employers is so easy when you're not able to speak. any-way.

what else.

i'm in yoger having now switched to large lattes. (despite the need to cutdowndairy).. i was going to fix up her apt for when she got back and now i'm like uh no. i just don't even know how to protect the next teacher coming in. it's a vicious cycle. and that atmosphere that was smoothing over? even now that we've been put into a hallway for a lunchroom? yah. sure. great. oh man. i was going to go on about other things. but well what to do. i am down to a size 16 from a 24. and that allergy to stress might be true as the other M texted me about the 30days notice she got and my chest started getting all itchy.

speaking of- i love that i keep running into christians. my doctor just sent me this:
Dear M.
It's a beutiful day and nice to see you again.
I am pleased to let you the last result.
The allergen test for cacao showed negative, that is no antibody against cacao.
 I'd like to recommend that you make your immune system healthy through regular excercise and proper healthy diet. Moreover, eliminating emotional stress..
It will help you..

God bless you.
 From S.Kim.
(Halla hospital)

May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ,
and the love of God,
and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit
be with you all

Amen right? The other day Danica said she saw me on a meathook. Waiting. And only God can let me off of it. One of the verses that struck me that she sent was "Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD."... It's that whose trust IS the Lord. Like He Himself is trust. Embodies it. Is it. So to need trust, and to seek- is to seek the Lord himself. And i like that. It's not something I lack. Aw, you just blogged. Hi you. from the future.

xo, m.

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