Since I've Been Gone, by M

Usually I come home pretty wiped out from the day what with the 10hours of physical labor and what not. Ever since the pre/pro crew left, along with Scully and then the Production crew walked in- the energy shifted and it took some getting used to. It's dark for instance. The usual khaki shorts and black shirts, walkies, lots of shouting to be QUIET ON SET, and I meanwhile get coated in plaster, paint and grime and find myself mid brushstroke, carrying the paint bucket, washing something, walking, drinking and have to PAUSE and SETTLE in while they shoot. Plus I stand out what with the uncleanliness. The swearing is down too and the smoking is solely out of doors though these guys tend to circle and smoke together and bitch about everything...and its a whole different kind of tense. Sort of uptight and responsible and not gruff and manic. Sort of crazy disguised as normal.

But I wanted to tell you the end of the story. I have a week left and its a bit of a grind. The Prod Designer came in today, for instance, and said that I'd tracked plaster into the office and that he'd managed to pick up all the pieces. But after 2 weeks of him complaining, as nice as he is, about tidying piles, catching drips, trash, misaligned things, and order I'm tired of him too.

But the prepro crew, though I can't beat the last story, I have to wrap them up with the following:

Masturbation metaphor: I used to do my first experiments in the lavatory. (guy glances over at me, i'm grinning, they apologize anyway.) Cuz its a lot like "laboratory". Sorry.

Girl scenic help: I locked my keys in the car! A few guys glance up from their breakfast plates and immediately wheels start turning. They infact make her sit down and belay her call to AAA. They ask, what kind of car? She says, Jeep Cherokee. They resume eating. Then suddenly about 4 of them disappear. I wander out later and there is various bits of guy talk about breaking into cars and they seem to be discouraged about their abilities. But a guy named Beano who has a cigar in his mouth, white hair, stocky and had recently said to me as I held a calking gun, I want you to do that to me later. I said, not unless you pay me. He says, you'll do it for free and you'll like it.

He's the man at the drivers door. And holding a long strip of metal they've taken from one of their wood and drywall deliveries. Scully calls AAA and Scenic Girl and a few others walk off. Suddenly there's a pop and Beano says, "I still got it!" I applaud and whistle and the others come back out. He got it?! "Yah I got it." He struts back in and we all get back to work. Scenic Girl is saved a call but now nervous about her car.

Are You A Friend of Bill?: That's what Scully and D- asked me as I stared out at them from the loading bay as they smoked their cigarettes. Scully says, This is my last habit I swear. I shrug my shoulders, now already embodying some sort of moral/social and ethical force of clean living. As they walk in they say, Are you a friend of Bill? I say, No, I'm a friend of Rob. They laugh. They're like, ha! we like that! That's even better!

Not sure what the punchline is but having an inkling I google it and sure enough its urban slang for asking if I'm in recovery... a broad application, first for AA and also NA and whatever recovery type of thing we're talking about addiction wise. Maybe they were taking bets on how squeaky my clean really was. Though most people on set think i'm about 21. It's a compliment yes? but a little bit annoying... and surprisingly a lot of people on set are all 33. And they all say, oh you're MY age. Yes, yes I am, actually.

So,the friend of bill research sort of prepared me for D- and his eyes getting wider, and the hair sticking straight up, and his face beet red come Tuesday. And he can't seem to stand still any longer or take direction, or complete a task and he disappears for hours and the PD keeps asking where is D and i DON'T KNOW. But D when I do see him says, I turned down two jobs for this. I'm hung over. My girlfriend is mad at me. I hate production-sort of clues me into his state of mind so I felt a little bad for him when I saw him slumped over on a 5 gallon paint bucket snoring and dead to the world... but then he disappeared completely and they said he'd been sent home because he stole pills and then I found 6 empty beer bottles behind the paint cans and an empty cigarette pack- but of course with the boys there are always 2nd chances and he showed up the next day, normal and straight, sullen and so over everything. Which I get. I do. It happens. Which is why sometimes you have to leave before last call and the show closes for the night. Even if the PD thinks you're going to stay and work on the castle and you drive home anyway.

Makes me think of the day that Scully slapped me on the ass a couple of times and said, Good job Mama!

And I smile and I wish I was back there with all of them like that. Not in the dark, listening to bad acting and waiting to rust rivets on doors, waiting for it to end or something else to happen or for D to disappear or the PD to complain about the mess or feel bad about my boys working 16 hour days- and finding someway to get a life despite that.

G'nite.