In Other News, by M

I'm in a moderate amount of pain. I had that vigorous hike on Sunday and then met with my trainer on Monday- who proceeded to make me do scissor kicks, air bicycle, elliptical for 40, medicine ball twists, and more harrowing core strengthening exercises. It was the last cool down on the elliptical that did me in really. I could feel it as I got off. But being oblivious to the impending doom I probably didn't drink enough water or devise a 'burn that lactic acid off' strategy- As the following day led to 8 hours of ass-sitting, coupled with another 4+ hours of ass-sitting... dinner and Tosca @the LAoPera. It was lovely and the dinner was good. But every time I got up to get food, answer the phone, go to the loo, and gaze into the night, was coupled with pain. Still is coupled with pain which is causing me too actually stoop and shuffle until my quads decide they can let the death grip of pain go down to a dull ache. It's good times I assure you! So much so that besides heavily dosing advil, icy hot, i'm actually considering delaying post-bday dinner plans so i can go swimming and hit the steam room. Or sauna? I don't remember which is better for this sort of idiocy.

Besides that, my over exuberance to purchase my planetix left me blowing off LAX in favor of burbank, without doublechecking, which is only 5min away vs. 40-- and costing myself oh, roughly, $168 more. Sure I cut down on early wake times, and 1.5hours of 405drivetime and $8 for no flyawayshuttle (plus time waiting) service... but still I can't help but feel the sting.

I keep thinking there must be something else to report but hopefully no. Just idle complaints about how my brother who is now married with child thinks that because I'm single, my trip is less debt worthy, than oh lets say the enormous debt incurred by children... what-EVER. Whatever to that. As he says, have you paid off x, y, z... and I'm thinking, oh so your house and CC is paid off and NOW you're having a child. Oh, okay. NOT. Fucking married people and their anti-single bias bullshit.

Alright I'm stopping now.
Tomorrow I'll report on all the warm fuzzy thoughts of 32.

Odallaly! by M

Yah, still going to CENAM, checking stuff off my list and freaking out about things like mosquito nets and micro-fiber clothing. I have neither. For some reason things like deet and proper lightweight hiking shoes and an mp3 player have now become extremely important- now that travel insurance, plane tix and trip deposit are purchased. As if I have money left for such things. It's a wonder anyway and I'm sorry you'll be hearing about this for a while. It says in the "Birthday Book" that I don't handle financial affairs well and that i have scorn for such practical concerns, but more importantly it asserts that "Movement and travel of all sorts are important to those born on this day. Depression often overcomes [me] at a time of real or imagined unpopularity, especially when they feel stuck in one place or occupation..." so clearly what the "book" is saying is exactly what's happening. Right? Right. In other news I had a boring post about how I officially broke up with my trainer, like a coward and left a message for him, and then he retaliated and made it difficult for me when I started seeing someone else. But I deleted it. Yawn. Anywayz Jason and I are really happy together right now and it's totally going to work out- until I run out of sessions that is. Awkward. Though I do now want to be in peak me physical condition. That'd be nice. But it's not like I'm hiking to Macchu Picchu. As one work guy said, "um, youd have to start doing like, a lot of cardio."... I'm way lazier than that. Jason already had to use the phrase, "this is your last set, let's wrap it up, we don't have forever." Clearly. Jason. Clearly.

My life. My funds. My everything.

Ah You Know,

I think I sorta really don't like my trainer. Wednesday, after he broke up with me, he called me and wanted to know where I was. Like I didn't even listen to the entire message so tired as I was from like our disastrous relationship so far. Hello!? you broke up with me! And I was in the middle of dinner where we were celebrating my dads 60th birthday. Where upon my friend Kerry and my dad started harassing each other about politics and Amber started making unkind remarks about Jesus. It was like I was at dinner with my older and younger sister (both Aries) and I just sat there and thought, oh jesus christ. Like alot. In between this my mom started telling stories about how there was a man who wanted to be rehired at her work. He wrote on his application that 2 of his sons couldn't be trusted and have amounted to nothing in life. I wonder when the age cut off is. Is it 30? I feel like it might be, but maybe it's 35. Any thoughts on this? I'm not sure. Anyway and then he started faxing 9page love letters to the HR woman named Nancy. Aw, sweet. STALKER! Anyway then inbetween bristling remarks about Obama not being a Christian and Jesus being equated with a magician who pulls bunnies out of a hat my mom interjected another story about a man at work who got to finally use his CPR training, since a guy in the jacuzzi was passed out but no one at the gym called 911 or knew how to help him. It just proves there's only like the 1 guy. Which is pretty true of life. Anyway Kerry kept looking at me to say something to Amber but I just shook my head and rolled my eyes and when Amber would look at me like, please make dad stop talking about Obama because we're both voting for Hilary I just sighed and asked dad and mom how sad it might be if we only vote for McCain- unless his VP is like, killer... so after I don't know how many- interruptions my mom finished each of her stories, the chocolate dipped fortune cookies and hot tea came out and then my dad went to go smoke. Of course he never came back. And then mom says, It's not like in the old days when he used to return to the table. What?! Well anyway. So then we leave and get fancy cupcakes for dessert and pile on candles and sing my dad Happy Birthday and then the next day I eat another cupcake, 2 cookies and a Tommy's Burger but decided I'd go to the gym anyway just to run into my "trainer"... who tried to blame me for everything then wondered what the point was if I only met him once a week. I'm like, listen jackhole- where upon he answered his phone twice! while I was sitting there- which just led me to wonder how on earth I can get rid of him for good. Though we're back on for our appt 2wks from now. And then I wonder when my mom started getting better at diversionary conversational tactics, or my dad started acting like a really old man, and how I suddenly have 2 sisters and a sugar addiction. It might be planetary though or a phase of the moon but I'm going to just chalk it up to weirdness and try and act as calmly and normally as possible this weekend.

M: At least

you two care.

TheTRAINER'S name is John. I was suppose to train with Courtney, and she called me once to confirm our training sessions, which was promptly put on my to-do lists. Meanwhile, Courtney decided to move or something so John called me and left a message then called me AGAIN. And I picked up. I swear I was not avoiding them. Anyway, John is all irksome and like, yah well Courtney left and blah blah so... we need to get you on the calendar so blah blah. And then he says, You can actually workout before we begin, or the training sessions begin- but i thought he meant like actually come to the gym and start working out and I was all- jerk. Talk about condescending and then I called Amber and was all, I think my trainer is all grr nazi condescending and she's all, um, he probably just meant warm up so that you can go in at 630 and the session can begin at 700, and I'm all OOh. But anyway both of my training sessions are on peoples birthdays because apparently I can't escape Aries in my life- bcs kerry is on the 14th and Amber is on the 15th even though they like totally hate each other. I'ts like mixing white and dark chocolate in the worst ways even though they are totally both chocolate. Then my dad's birthday is the 16th. My niece is March 26th and I can think of at least 3 other people who I know- wait 4- who have that whole hey I'm a fiery stubborn bleeting Aries, or whatever. So now I have to be all, um John I need to reschedule even though like I fully knew I would have to when he was making me write them down. I did say I was penciling them in but um yah...

So the MOVIES: Amber and Kerry are movie-holics. I just, I mean I'm more a Tv, media-holic. And I just don't care about going to the "movies" and seeing it on the big screen. . . but anyway so Amber and I coordinate Netflix rentals sometimes, besides endlessly fighting. Just because I "liked" something doesn't mean it was good. Her tastes are oddly way less discriminating but conversely specific but she fast-forwards thru movies which i cannot almost ever abide. Because I think movies aren't just plot but emotionally driven and you can't possibly get that when 1/2 of it was a blur. So this weekend included:

• No Country For Old Men: (her choice) The 2nd viewing clarified some things about the whacked out ending but not by much. Anyway I still like it, but seriously what the hell is with that ending. The words are still all literary and amazing and the violence is still definitely UGH. Gross. But strangely this was not the only killing movie we'd see. Amber did not like it. I told her she wouldn't. And I did, for her sake, fastforward thru some of the violent scenes while stopping for the dialogue. I rated this movie 4/5 stars. Mainly some of the themes I felt could've come across stronger and I loved TommyLeeJones- but the main assertion that this is no country for old men is sort of moot when you're up against a psycho with supernatural propensities. I was like really? Is that what you're saying? Or just life in general? And aren't there healthier ways to grapple with mortality. I don't know. But maybe that's my struggle with Lee's character.
• The MIST: (My choice) Our favorite line: "Oh don't worry. It's not my blood." Hi=larious. There were some good moments and some weak ones. It was basically an uneven movie. But lovely, how it all quickly spiraled out of control and went to shit. And Amber and I do really, really enjoy talking about what we would be doing together in that kind of situation. We'd rally the forces. She'd try to kill the religious zealot. I'd try to talk her out of it...etc. Anyway we always have those conversations, as we chat thru movies like there's no tomorrow, that: Oh hey, wouldn't it be rad if... ah, but they'd never. So THEN**SPOILER** the rational group loses their nuts too and decide to flee the store after killing the religious lady (no way!) Who by the way has no actual understanding of Jesus and sacrifice. This was a major hole in that if you're gonna make them crazy I wonder if you could make their faith more real, but maybe that's the point. Bcs it's weird that a bible-toting whack job wouldnt use the word Jesus or understand that "sacrifice" is no longer necessary, but I digress. There are some GREAT character actors in this piece who got not nearly enough screen time, but anyway, so then like DUMBASSES they take 1.no supplies- food, weapons, water except for a weakly established gun that has as we find out only 4 bullets. 2. No gas 3. No logic 4. No actual escape plan. DUMBASSES. So of course the guy takes his son to see if his wife made it. She totally did not. The old couple in the back who were at the beginning of the movie full of fucking smarts somehow lose theirs and the blonde chick who has "faith in humanity" all tag along bcs they didn't get eaten by giant insects... cuz yah it was the "govt."... not the supernatural. I think a weak point. But anyway so then the dumbasses run out of gas. And they see this giant creature and they're like oh well fuck it. GAME FUCKING OVER. And when he pulls out the gun, you're thinking no fucking way! but then, holy fuck! WHAT!!?!? He shoots them all. Our hero shoots his son, his would be love interest and the 2 smarty pants old people. Then gets out of the car waiting to be eaten. Only to see the "Mist" receding and the military doing damage control and rescuing survivors. Fucking what!? So of course he just starts shrieking. Amber and I went from 2/5 stars to 3.5/5 stars just for that fucking twisted mfo of an ending. Hence, wow! That was MIST-tastic!!
• IRA& ABBY: (My choice) So yah, some funny moments, but ultimately and unwanted cynical view of marriage but flimsy, godless and narrow. I said "I liked it." Amber did not but I was at least trying to branch out with the movie choices.
• THE BRAVE ONE: (her choice) So, okay. It had a slow beginning. There could've been more concrete details to the life she had vs. the life she took on, besides showing that she used to wear flowy white skirts but now wears nothing but grey tight fitting shirts and dark eyeshadow. **SPOILER** And it got a little better as it went on, and as we saw the detective begin to figure out that she was the killer of all these people- like 8/9 by the end of the movie. And that there was this mutual attraction which was almost too subtly unspoken. Like there needed to be just a bit more. But anyway so hello, you think, sure he's going to catch her and turn her in and blah blah whatever. But then at the end he helps her shoot the last guy then asks her to turn the gun on him so she can be for once free and clear of all the murders. And by the end of the movie he's being put in an ambulance and she's walking off with her dog no longer afraid of the night. WTF!>? MIST-TASTIC! That's what we're saying! So my rating went from a 3 to a 4 on that, ballsy if slightly unwarrented ending. But I like it. A twist so easy that well, um, she gets away with it. NO reprucussions. Fucking yah! MIST-TASTIC!!
• Under the Tuscan Sun... oh geez. I can't talk about it. IT's always on cable. What's a girl to do. Even if it is mostly lame and cringe worthy.

Wow, so, I should've been doing like many other things on my todo list but you guys totally baited me. If you stayed till the end, bravo, seriously. I mean I am interesting and rad and so are my thoughts but everyone has their limits. ALright i have to go revise my todo list and get some water now that we're all out of dietcoke and what not.

Peace. M.