dear m,

It occurs to me that I haven’t weighed myself in months—not because I’m all liberated from the concept of weight, but because at some point I had reencountered a number I hadn’t seen in a long while, and decided I couldn’t bear to see the number rise away again? So even though I know full well I’m least five pounds more now, in my mind I’m still that pseudo-goal weight. Ignorance really can be bliss. Or ignorance. Whichever.

I’ve been to yoga 3x in 7 days and provided all goes according to plan tomorrow, I’ll go again. Sweetness. It is an hour in which I’m allowed to dump/cast aside/quiet all the noise in my mind. I have varying degrees of success on that, but the effort always yields some positive vibes.

I have a lot of side work this week, and so the children unfortunately must be parked in front of the television, especially in the afternoons, and then I feel guilty for that, but what can you do. At least it’s cloudy and damp outside, as I imagine the guilt would be even heavier if it were sunny. Although thinking about the long-term, I’m doubting they’ll be scarred by these moments of intermittent neglect for the sake of some pocket cash. Not too badly, anyway.

In the meantime, I’m fairly certain that I’ll forget something big in regards to hosting Thanksgiving, but plan to enjoy it anyway. The furniture invariably will be dusty, but enough food will be available to all, and really I can’t think of anything better at the moment than lazing around in a post-parade-and-turkey coma.

Sadly, I must brave Wal-Mart tomorrow post yoga, as I have another of those long and random shopping lists that demand economy of both time and funds. Everything from canned cranberry sauce to cupcake frosting to advent wreath materials for church on Sunday. What can you do. Wish me luck.

-pen.