dearest oldsame,

Laos! The last part of your journey has arrived. Or you have arrived to it. I cannot be-lieve your long-loved knife was taken, and how vexing that its fate was due to an oh-so-simple lapse in human mindfulness, a mere glitch in the everything-is-in-its-proper-place-for-my-next-phase-of-travel rundown. Ach. Eff. It's so. unfair!

The LentenFestival-retreat-type weekend was delightful in the end. A lot of leadup, and some trepidation over it being all-too-much and worrying over the success of things like the Easter Garden. But the garden was successful, as was the decoupage, and both were displayed during Sunday service and officially dedicated in prayer. I mean. Thankfully I wasn't asked to stand or anything, but it was both mortifying and beautiful at the same time. The garden came out so. good. And not just aesthetically, but everyone old and young alike seemed to love it. It lives on in the Fellowship Hall, where I hope it will receive enough light and whateverelse it needs to stay alive or even thrive. Hopefully not die. We'll see.

All the rest - bells was a success. Our variety show portion I mean. I think people got it. And the rest of the show was a delightful blend of young and old, talent and silliness, magic shows and a keyboard performance and the tango. And then a synchronized swimming skit by a group of the older men that was totally posted on youtube, so I'm sending you a link. Saturday after gardening and birdhousing and musicalinstrument-making, I went around the hobby showcase to see the things people delve into in their ordinary lives - again, how delightful. Coins and photos and felting (like actual spinning of the material) and robots and art. And I briefly learned to knit. I think I'm officially sucked into the knitting group on occasional Thursdays, though it's doubtful how long my schedule will abide. But the older ladies in that group were just so. pleased. that I might be interested, how can I say no now. Hmm.

I miss you and hope you come to visit soon, even if it's not in March. But I hope it's in March - is that even a possibility still? I haven't tallied all the places you've been monetarily thwarted and spent to see if you can come here first before Cali, even though probably you are completely yearning to be back in your true homeland, not just stateside, and I completely understand that. If I won the scratch-off lottery and were able to buy a plane ticket, I'd visit you tomorrow. And take puppy with me.

The caterpillars, which I have yet to blog about but I'll fill in the gaps shortly I promise, lie dormant in full chrysalide mode on the dining room table. Today is rain and cold and some homemade soup I think. March holds: more jobhunting, cabincamping, consignmentsale-ing, 35thbirthday!-ing, fairtradesale-organizing, oh and Easter. And planting! Right? Some flowers and some lettuce at least.
love to you in laos-land,
penelaotang.

Penbriant,

hello friend- oh oh oh there's so much to say. so many little things that i want to communicate that are slipping away. when i last left you, you were driving off into the sunset sick to your stomach and entering an adventure of an indetermint length and lets be honest, nature. you're essentially a tourist with a home. things will not be the same. things will be absurd, to different, to being written in a completely different language. you will not understand everything. your whole body will vibrate with the difference. it is best to take notes and keep telling the world your story. really, that's the most impt thing. and we thank you.

back to me, i can only stave off narcissism for so long, except for being on the prayer team where my mind is now teeming with divorce, cancer, cancer, cancer, drugs, money, dying, heart surgery, brain tumors, charters, tiresomeness, and whatever else. but nevermind that, only God can do something about that. i will throw in my request to break myself from the, not looking toward the moneyless cliff or the haven't gotten around to etsy yet, or the, i'm going to be singleforever... anyway, look here how my cat resents me working on the christmastide necklaces... i got 3/4 done despite him.

i did have a smashing sucess of sunday night. i was telling someone just before hand how i missed being around boys and then i got dosed with them from about 5pm-1am. go me being social! also it was a wise choice to continue to the 2nd location. usually it's not, but it was nice, even when no girls joined (potential awkward disaster) but. the boys were polite, playful, serious, articulate, witty and generous... it was the kind of high and frivilous night that if we had been younger would've carried us to 7am and a wafflehouse. ben is going away... on sabbatical i say, back to san jose. aw, we miss ben already. this is actually the first time i'd been out with him outside prayer council meetings.

bye cute ben. bye. and may i say he has the most awesome friends. one, a friend i've known since my co-op days, who btw he and ben, introduced me as an artist everytime, she's a very talented artist, they'd say. it was a big bearhug everytime to my heart. alsa the two verbal highlights besides the constant improv'ing- his friend saying "guys, i have a kidney to take out in 7 hours."... wait, he's not joking. and then arguing whether or not tolstoy betrayed his characters... oh yes, high times i tell you! bruce sauntering down the street with bottles of wine, being tempted with delicious looking breadpudding, deadwood references, and did i mention all the boys?

and given the energy and chatter of sunday, monday could not possibly live up, despite the friends, walks, crafting, and coffee taking. but it was good. the last couple days have been a little not-definable but somehow i'm getting some-things done? and watching too much tv. possibly consuming too much sugar... oh and i did start to tear up on my yoga teachers last day, at the end of class, and then again in the car. i'm taking everything a little too hard right now- the leaving, the suckitude of advent, but anyway. back to pretty sparkly things. fa la la la... no this isn't my house. mom's given up on christmas. but i did put out the advent pillows.
m.