okay, so...

refer to the pic before the christmas fallout.

I'm lost on a particular level in this game and if I hit the reset button i have to go back to the beginning. for one thing i used all my credit points to buy supplies, but realized that $100 for a dating service was too much, then instead, bought way too many cocunut advantage bars- meanwhile the trader joe trail mix is getting stale. how am i expected to survive on this. also i've acquired a taste for diet dr.pepper. which if you think about it, i have to stop.

so anyway i get on my bike and ride the 4 miles to work on pothole ridden roads, past a golf center and what used to be a quarry- or a dump- i'm not sure. i think the golf center used to be the dump and the quarry/dump is actually just not in use. then i drove past the burbank airport runway. mental note: i will pause to watch the plane accelerate right at me and take off. i will. i just haven't yet. because here, i can do that. i think, what the hell kinda small town am i in anyway? quarry's and dumps? has this place been here the whole time? why haven't i ever snuck onto the dump property or gone tojumpintheabandoned quarry- why haven't i ever been chased by a junk yard dog? i think, god almighty, what kind of friends did i have that we never even thought to jump on bikes late at night and do that. sure we had the mountains, and this particular water run off pipe but really its not the same and i had to DRIVE to get there and that was in high school. (i'm digressing).

i've stored up my energy credits and calculate that leaving 30min to ride 4miles East, then in a SE direction, it should be 1) fairly easy 2) even keeled 3) manage to avoid trucks and all will be well. i don't want to read this: GAME OVER - on my forehead, or have to refuse emergency service because i don't have health insurance, which if i ever needed an ambulance i sort of imagine myself grasping "the guy" and saying, "don't call an ambulance, i can't afford it!" So, I wear a helmut. Which makes me look like an idiot. That's fine. I'm a pro. I don't mind it. I have gloves.

the JOB: I got this job thru a temp agency. Which if I took zanex, i'd say, i'd popped one, to suck up the nerve to sign up. but since i don't, i didn't and it wasn't that bad.. but it did take me 1 1/2 years to do it. so much for expediancy. it took me that long bcs i've been temping for about - god, 9 years maybe? well off and on. and the jobs, with the exception of, maybe- 2, ended tragically- with "your assignment's ended BCS" or they didn't want you back BCS... which accumlated involved: lightswitches and dark corridors, an HR lady who hated me, a bitter music major who hated me, internet surfing, ambivilance, wandering around cubicles humming horror themes with a rubber band, waiting for things to catch on fire, an earthquake to happen, a free turkey, a car catching on fire, free wooden circles, a dolphin centerpiece, kilbasa?, cakes, company lunches, desk after desk after conference room, and once, a place i could kick off my shoes. did i mention florescent lighting? god-forsaken-florescent-lighting?

so i get there and i am immediately tested by the reception god: it's not difficult. i use my charming magik (the power level on this skill is erratic)... i answer simple questions like, how's my drive, what'll i be doing. I think, is she charming ME? I answer with a SMILE. my patience is rewarded with the arrival of one whose approval i need to gain admittance. she makes me sign a "contract"- did i mention the drug test? i am wary of this level already. this place for one has a tree made of pointsetta plants. 2nd, when i asked what the company did- the god said, you may glance upon these encased relics. i said, i have not the skill. the god said, very well then: ABS brakes for airlines. (i gained a credit). who knew. i guess someone has to make them. behind a thick door i hear the hum of machines and the scent of motor oil hits me- i think, ah motor oil.. it's like THAT other job i had in the aerospace industry.

the FLOOR: now this is really where the level begins. i think, i will destroy the picture they took of me lest it get into the wrong hands. it's a sea of cubicles as high as an elephants eye. and roughly the size of a small gym but not as tall. it is GREY. there are no windows, except for the ones behind the closed doors where the conference tables and the executive offices are. I'll watch for MONSTERS.oddly this is where all the admin people are. I mean i'm sitting right next to the guy who does workers comp and I'M IN contract sales. i think this will be a difficult level. my only avatars are 1) biking equals exercise. 2) money means a) no bankruptcy b) no defaulting on loans c) i can really afford a dating service now! d) i can still look for a job and do this at the same time. Come ON NOW! it's not SO BAD. it's not THAT BORING. besides, you've got your cellphone that you can check email on and listen to the radio... sure those trips to the bathroom might get suspicious, but i drink a lot of water and i have a small bladder. i have been practicing this one. it's like sharpening a skill- predicting difficult and inquisitve questions. avoiding trouble. avoiding that word called "NOLONGERNEEDED"... I CAN DO THIS!

but then i sit down at my desk on day one. now keep in mind, i've only had 2. i confront a little sign that says- S5 LEVEL 4. where am i? why am i level four and paul across the way is level 2. i walk around obsessed with peoples level. i note that all the computer moniters are observable. the bad feng si of this alone might deplete my mind credits. i can't ascertain if level four is higher than level 2. i would consider that it involves more risk, more likely that i would be terminated or carried away by angry gremlins seeking revenge for the murder of their high lord GRo:G. i didn't do it i say! i didn't. he fell on my sword on accident- but only bcs he was pushed by the treacherous Li Mi. I'll get even for that act- i swear.

i would talk to the people in the cubicles next to me, but i haven't ascertained their allegiances or their intelligence levels. not everyone GETS that florescent light deteriotes the little fibers in your soul, or cereberal cortex, or whatever is cooler. and i can't say, who's on the Queen's side or mine- i mean I AM in a hive. and lest i actually get terminated, by lets say a roaving mutant released by said queen, or killed because the t-1 virus spread thru the vents- only to be regenerated as a zombie only to get hacked down by the ascerbic yet determined mila as i grasp for the one thing i want more than anything in the world,...

nevermind.

day 2: i pedal home: slightly grueling as i didn't intend for my bike to be now going in a NW by W position. . . the wind. the horrible horrible wind. but i make it home. i think i can do this. i think i will calculate for the wind and NW position next time.