Risen early. A leisured morning. I wore my darkblue sun dress, having lately reclaimed the color from my somber past. The compliments I received and the look of my warm complexion in it overrode the fleeting cringe. A couple months ago I bought the first yellow shirt I’d ever owned and I would have rather worn that. But the white skirt, coincidentally bought with the blue dress was stained- it was the first of that color for a skirt too, and the yellow and white made a pleasing pair. Daring I thought, in all my now 32 years.
I stood on the train platform glancing around to make sure I was where I was suppose to be, favoring my right knee and noting with a smile that though silver and slick, trains had lost none of their romance. My meager supplies wouldn’t carry me far but my trip down the coast to San Juan Capistrano carried me far enough out of my own mind and into the fabric of my heart- azure sea, old plastered walls…
I tested several seats and still found myself going backwards and windowless, but it seemed perfect to tuck my feet up and incline my large frame- read my book about an island and wished myself there as the train blurred the landscape. My brow, in unguarded moments contracted in dissatisfaction- Claudius would say to bear our hearts in grief and our whole kingdom contracted in a brow of woe… but I have no idea what this bearer mourns, and yet she does, unabated on two weeks.
I heard the clipped cadence of “tickets please” and with things for though contracted, a smile of amusement would play upon these lips, as this anachronistic man stopped short, hand extended, punch, punch, with his hat just so in all seriousness moved through the train.
I arrived and was not upswept in arms embraced. Neither a man, nor a lover, my friend was late. My feet brandished the concrete nature of here and now as I was carried into the orbit of my friends distress, her joys, her questions, and how she speaks to me as kindred, as an artist… and we landed after many turns on a quiet Café Mozart for lunch. I had chicken schnitzel and with each bite incongruously took me to Turkey. The Germans are everywhere I said. Elisa nodded in agreement. From one German to another it seemed to be so… I wished to be everywhere also. And we were the only diners at the restaurant.
As we talked I wondered how the place stayed in business and she said, parties. And like a magic word uttered the crew quietly set themselves up around us. One stack of white something or others moored themselves before my eyes and then tables with rapidity rolled by and built up like a break to the right and then the umbrellas around us flew off their ornamented tables and one by one they themselves disappeared in the wake. Until our table, lonely and the sea impatient, waited to consume it.
And finally when as we rose and wadded past the shops it seemed as if the structure of our lives was breaking up around us so that I was quiet and did not wonder where we would land but felt the sand, and noted the sun and we, racing toward I know not what. Until with luck and a late train I bounded to meet it.
But the arch of the evening came on and I found myself in Hollywood sitting on a curb waiting to be picked up and feeling the quiet of a side street about to give birth to a sprawling complex. It would never whisper as it did now- and over dinner and a chance encounter with other friends I found myself full and brimming. And Kerry said, here I bought you this. And out came this black workout outfit for $10. And in the parking lot by our cars I put on the pants and took off my dress and found myself garnered in the soft comfort of mourning colors. My red bra only exposed for a short time…
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
i do not like them, pen i am
TEXTURE issues, noticed as of late:
-Grapes with that weird grittiness on their skin, the kind of grit that doesn't come off when you wash them. Hate that chalk-on-chalkboard feel on my teeth.
-Dry palms, like sandpaper. Didn't think I used the antibacterial hand stuff *that* much, but clearly I am amiss on this assessment.
-Great green gobs of greasy, grimy algae in the fish tank. I know. It needs a good scrubbing. But I dread it with every fiber of my being.
-Grapes with that weird grittiness on their skin, the kind of grit that doesn't come off when you wash them. Hate that chalk-on-chalkboard feel on my teeth.
-Dry palms, like sandpaper. Didn't think I used the antibacterial hand stuff *that* much, but clearly I am amiss on this assessment.
-Great green gobs of greasy, grimy algae in the fish tank. I know. It needs a good scrubbing. But I dread it with every fiber of my being.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Where Have I...
BEEN?!
In a funk
In a to do list that never got started
In a pool
In a church
In a gym
In a book by the sea
In a train
In a restaurant
In a malaise clouded moment
In a garden in the sun
In a diet coke and sunflowerseeds
In a workplace
In a creditcard
In a place that does not want to express
In a vivid blue sky-sunflowered afternoon
In a funk
In a to do list that never got started
In a pool
In a church
In a gym
In a book by the sea
In a train
In a restaurant
In a malaise clouded moment
In a garden in the sun
In a diet coke and sunflowerseeds
In a workplace
In a creditcard
In a place that does not want to express
In a vivid blue sky-sunflowered afternoon
dear m,
Please return to the blog anon. Blogdom misses you. Penelope misses you!
We require the following assignments to be completed by week's end:
Wierd Facts Wednesday (2, one for last week, one for this week)
Post entitled: About my Weekend
Post entitled: Where I'm Going, Where I've Been
Post entitled: Today I...
For good measure: Not 2, but 4 pages of your novel (2 for last time, one for this time), emailed to Penelope
And then: raise that chin up!
Perhaps a smile or two? (Wan smiles will not be accepted for credit.)
Lastly: locate signature mendacious effervescence and sparkliness!
We feel these assignments will do all of us good: you, me, Blogdom. It's a morale-booster for sure.
Good luck in your mission. I am available for assistance.
xoxo,
penelope
We require the following assignments to be completed by week's end:
Wierd Facts Wednesday (2, one for last week, one for this week)
Post entitled: About my Weekend
Post entitled: Where I'm Going, Where I've Been
Post entitled: Today I...
For good measure: Not 2, but 4 pages of your novel (2 for last time, one for this time), emailed to Penelope
And then: raise that chin up!
Perhaps a smile or two? (Wan smiles will not be accepted for credit.)
Lastly: locate signature mendacious effervescence and sparkliness!
We feel these assignments will do all of us good: you, me, Blogdom. It's a morale-booster for sure.
Good luck in your mission. I am available for assistance.
xoxo,
penelope
Thursday, June 26, 2008
*star* talk
It seems like the use of *asterisks* in writing is all of a sudden popular. I don't know where it comes from or how exactly it caught so that now *everyone* is doing it, but I confess I kind of love it. Is it the written version of the *air quote,* like when you put up your hands and quote a *catch phrase* and/or convey a sense of *irony?* Maybe it is like saying *ahem* on the page. There is an air of *sarcasm* in there, but not in a mean way, it seems more to connote *wit* or, if one is referring to oneself, an added air of *self-deprecation.*
I enjoy new trends in written communication.
And because I am an even bigger nerd, I admit that a small point of style issue with the *asterisks* is keeping me up at night. Do they function like quotation marks in America, or like the colon and semi-colon. Meaning, when using asterisks in conjunction with other punctuation, does that other punctuation fall inside or outside of the asterisks? Because asterisks function so similar to quotation marks, just with a slightly different connotation, I have decided to treat them similarly. Periods, question marks, and exclamation points will fall inside the last asterisk at the end of a sentence, while colons and semi-colons will be placed outside the last asterisk, like so:
Obviously, the rule would be just the opposite in Britain. I may be entirely incorrect, but because the *asterisk* trend is so new and maybe even just a passing phase, we could be waiting a while or even forever on an official grammatical ruling. So, you heard it here first: asterisks=quotation marks when it comes to points of style. I know you're all grateful for my *humanitarian efforts.*
I enjoy new trends in written communication.
And because I am an even bigger nerd, I admit that a small point of style issue with the *asterisks* is keeping me up at night. Do they function like quotation marks in America, or like the colon and semi-colon. Meaning, when using asterisks in conjunction with other punctuation, does that other punctuation fall inside or outside of the asterisks? Because asterisks function so similar to quotation marks, just with a slightly different connotation, I have decided to treat them similarly. Periods, question marks, and exclamation points will fall inside the last asterisk at the end of a sentence, while colons and semi-colons will be placed outside the last asterisk, like so:
1. Today, penelope blogged about punctuation trends, which are clearly *monumental.*
2. Tomorrow at Target, I wish to purchase the following *essentials*: cookies, Strawberry Shortcake band-aids, and perhaps another t-shirt.
Obviously, the rule would be just the opposite in Britain. I may be entirely incorrect, but because the *asterisk* trend is so new and maybe even just a passing phase, we could be waiting a while or even forever on an official grammatical ruling. So, you heard it here first: asterisks=quotation marks when it comes to points of style. I know you're all grateful for my *humanitarian efforts.*
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
what penelope does on her time off
So last month, I helped out my friend J, who works for OurFay-HAY in a rural county of our state, and I helped to judge an annual presentation competition. Whether I'm actually qualified to do such a thing is moot; the bottom line is that J needed help, and I can always use an excuse to get out of the house, away from the children, and so I agreed right away. A win-win. Besides, it might be kind of neat to say I was on a PANEL, in the manner of Simon, Randy, and Paula, who btw y'all, m had NO IDEA who I was talking about when I mentioned S, R, and P. We must harass her in the comments section.
Anyway, as far as I knew I wouldn't actually have to talk, just you know, score the presenters according to the standard criteria, and write down a few comments. Kind of like reviewing a piece for a fellow writer, right? The goal of effective communication is basically the same. So that day I actually only ended up scoring maybe 3 or 4 presenters? I remembered a landscaping presentation, jewelry making, and juggling. There are different categories and age groups for these presentations, but as far as ranking, it does get a little tricky with the apples vs. oranges conundrum. But we worked it out.
And I mean, honestly, it was fun! I did end up having to talk at the end as part of the group critique, where the judges and other facilitators offered general comments of encouragement and ways to improve. And the people ahead of me totally stole my ideas, so I ended up just reiterating what they said and feeling slightly like a jackhole--totally ironic in a public speaking competition, I realize. But anyway, it was fine.
So then, J asked me if I'd like to judge another competition, this one the district competition, or next level up before states. Some of the same kids would be moving on, but I wouldn't actually be judging them, I would be a judge for the Health&Fitness presentations. Again, qualified? Debatable. But I do know something about healthy eating and exercise, even if I don't always partake. And if we want to get technical, I have taken nutrition classes. Or one class. Years ago. But I digress. I agreed again, because weeee! Another excuse to get away from the children--er, take some time off from my job--and spend time with my east coast BFF that I don't get to see nearly enough.
Now, this presentation experience was quite a bit more involved: J works west from me, more out where my parents live, but then the competition was east, but yet not at all on the way for either one of us. So I ended up leaving the children with my parents overnight, and staying with J. We woke up at 5:30 AM, left the house before 6 AM, all to get to her workplace, which is about 45 minutes west, picking up one of the presenting kids on the way. I know. I'm lost right along with you. So then we all meet at around 7 AM, where the rest of the kids and J's assistant arrive, so that J can drive us all (4 kids, 3 adults total) in a 15-passenger van to the competition. We had Mapquest directions that were slightly off, and a GPS system that told a completely different story, so frankly it was a little hairy getting there. We were totally late, but it was fine.
I feel like the Health&Fitness room was actually waiting my arrival so they could begin? So that was slightly awkward. But I right away sat down and judged presentations (again, all age groups) on teeth brushing, sports playing, eating right, and exercise in general. And this time was prepared to be more vocal, wrote some notes down throughout so I'd have my thoughts together, and then, unlike most of the kids presenting, delivered my own thoughts without the crutch of my notecards. Which, again ironically, were the majority of all the judges' comments: notecards should not=crutch.
And the other two judges, I should mention as an aside--one is J's coworker who orginally proposed that I ride with her in the morning to this far-out county, this lady whom I never met? Freaked me out. And then I found out later that her original-original idea was for me to stay at her house the night before, since we all had to leave so early. Omg! Thankfully J talked her down from this insanity. The other judge was a colleague of hers that now lives in Ohio, and they were perfectly lovely and pleasant, but I did feel some pressure to go to lunch with them? A little weirdness there. I opted out in the most charming way I know how. And then later, while J and I were trolling around for some sort of ATM to buy lunch with, they came rolling up to us in their car, and paid me a few bucks for my efforts. Which was entirely unnecessary, but seriously appreciated, and kind of funny in a cosmic way, that an ATM of sorts would just roll up, just as one was requesting one from the Universe?
And so the kids were enjoyable as well, clearly all in the throes of those weird and uncomfortable teenage years and it was interesting to see the differences between them all. One was happy-go-lucky but rolled his eyes a lot at his mom, but not in a mean way really. One was pretty angry all day, but is generally self-deprecating... she needs some time I think, to kind of come out of that dark place. The two brothers were quiet and well-mannered and yet totally goofy and random when we took pictures. Another girl was composed and lovely and yet you know she was mainly more well-behaved because of our company, which I found amusing.
I called J.Lo to try and get us some more clear-cut directions back, but in the end we sort of concocted something else using the GPS again and J's own knowledge of how to get back to her office from another county office. Anyway, if you're still here, I felt this need to share my randomness and show you What Penelope Does in her Free Time. Things that in the past I may not have been drawn to at all, but now hold a certain appeal, since they get me out of the house and yet keep me off the street. Random, and yet entirely necessary.
Anyway, as far as I knew I wouldn't actually have to talk, just you know, score the presenters according to the standard criteria, and write down a few comments. Kind of like reviewing a piece for a fellow writer, right? The goal of effective communication is basically the same. So that day I actually only ended up scoring maybe 3 or 4 presenters? I remembered a landscaping presentation, jewelry making, and juggling. There are different categories and age groups for these presentations, but as far as ranking, it does get a little tricky with the apples vs. oranges conundrum. But we worked it out.
And I mean, honestly, it was fun! I did end up having to talk at the end as part of the group critique, where the judges and other facilitators offered general comments of encouragement and ways to improve. And the people ahead of me totally stole my ideas, so I ended up just reiterating what they said and feeling slightly like a jackhole--totally ironic in a public speaking competition, I realize. But anyway, it was fine.
So then, J asked me if I'd like to judge another competition, this one the district competition, or next level up before states. Some of the same kids would be moving on, but I wouldn't actually be judging them, I would be a judge for the Health&Fitness presentations. Again, qualified? Debatable. But I do know something about healthy eating and exercise, even if I don't always partake. And if we want to get technical, I have taken nutrition classes. Or one class. Years ago. But I digress. I agreed again, because weeee! Another excuse to get away from the children--er, take some time off from my job--and spend time with my east coast BFF that I don't get to see nearly enough.
Now, this presentation experience was quite a bit more involved: J works west from me, more out where my parents live, but then the competition was east, but yet not at all on the way for either one of us. So I ended up leaving the children with my parents overnight, and staying with J. We woke up at 5:30 AM, left the house before 6 AM, all to get to her workplace, which is about 45 minutes west, picking up one of the presenting kids on the way. I know. I'm lost right along with you. So then we all meet at around 7 AM, where the rest of the kids and J's assistant arrive, so that J can drive us all (4 kids, 3 adults total) in a 15-passenger van to the competition. We had Mapquest directions that were slightly off, and a GPS system that told a completely different story, so frankly it was a little hairy getting there. We were totally late, but it was fine.
I feel like the Health&Fitness room was actually waiting my arrival so they could begin? So that was slightly awkward. But I right away sat down and judged presentations (again, all age groups) on teeth brushing, sports playing, eating right, and exercise in general. And this time was prepared to be more vocal, wrote some notes down throughout so I'd have my thoughts together, and then, unlike most of the kids presenting, delivered my own thoughts without the crutch of my notecards. Which, again ironically, were the majority of all the judges' comments: notecards should not=crutch.
And the other two judges, I should mention as an aside--one is J's coworker who orginally proposed that I ride with her in the morning to this far-out county, this lady whom I never met? Freaked me out. And then I found out later that her original-original idea was for me to stay at her house the night before, since we all had to leave so early. Omg! Thankfully J talked her down from this insanity. The other judge was a colleague of hers that now lives in Ohio, and they were perfectly lovely and pleasant, but I did feel some pressure to go to lunch with them? A little weirdness there. I opted out in the most charming way I know how. And then later, while J and I were trolling around for some sort of ATM to buy lunch with, they came rolling up to us in their car, and paid me a few bucks for my efforts. Which was entirely unnecessary, but seriously appreciated, and kind of funny in a cosmic way, that an ATM of sorts would just roll up, just as one was requesting one from the Universe?
And so the kids were enjoyable as well, clearly all in the throes of those weird and uncomfortable teenage years and it was interesting to see the differences between them all. One was happy-go-lucky but rolled his eyes a lot at his mom, but not in a mean way really. One was pretty angry all day, but is generally self-deprecating... she needs some time I think, to kind of come out of that dark place. The two brothers were quiet and well-mannered and yet totally goofy and random when we took pictures. Another girl was composed and lovely and yet you know she was mainly more well-behaved because of our company, which I found amusing.
I called J.Lo to try and get us some more clear-cut directions back, but in the end we sort of concocted something else using the GPS again and J's own knowledge of how to get back to her office from another county office. Anyway, if you're still here, I felt this need to share my randomness and show you What Penelope Does in her Free Time. Things that in the past I may not have been drawn to at all, but now hold a certain appeal, since they get me out of the house and yet keep me off the street. Random, and yet entirely necessary.
Monday, June 23, 2008
While The Rents Away #2
Well hey there. So the paint job went succesfully. The color is much better and the controversial chocolate trim was the right move. We concede that decoratively they need to get rid of the carpet, replace the bed with a woodframed one, and redesign their closet-- there's no reason to have your clothes live on a bench and an empty chest also. And I would prefer that the dresser and small bookcase have stronger and more cohesive design elements but I had other things to do like demolish the bathroom and paint the garage and I didn't want to be THAT invasive- otherwise believe me all of those changes would've occured. But well, we do what we can and hope the parents come around. But at least you don't notice the walls anymore...
summer schrute love
Luckily, there's another fan out there ambitious enough to scan the photos from Rainn Wilson's recent "Hero Worship" shoot with EW magazine. Saved me the trouble of having to upload them myself. I give you Reason #706 for Why I LOVE Rainn Wilson.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
bathroom demo! oooh ya!
after this pic i did put a long sleeved shirt on and a full plexi face shield. and over the course of 3-4 hours sweat began pouring down my face because it was literally over 100 degrees in the room. damn plaster... i kept getting it in my eyes and sucking it into my nose. filled my garbage bin and another trashcan and then i stopped short of the shower and left that disaster for another day... discovering the toxic/non-toxic mold of black death was a bit of a downer... remember that pipe leak that we discovered in december? yah... good times! in that i suddenly feared for my life and retraced how i siphoned the air out of the bathroom as some of the dust had coated various things around the house... but whatever. i sort of like the bathroom more now. it's not trying to be a real bathroom with 1/2 finished walls. it's fully dismantled. and i think it likes it this way. it certainly does do something for the verticality of the place. and once mom gets rid of the mold it'll be a pretty livable place until we get around to fixing it- circa 2040.
i covered the blackdeath with garbage bags and duct tape-- bcs mold like stinks and is all spory and gross and what not...Saturday, June 21, 2008
Lil'
so my niece... lil. better pictures than before but all the other ones are less than flattering. i don't know why this is... or why i'm telling you. but anyway she has a very serious face but obviously quite the charmer when she wants to be. um, thee end. ?. i guess... till next time? i don't know. she's a kid. were mostly related? eh. 
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